Ji Won stepped out of her car, locked its door and walked to her apartment building.
"I'll pick you up at 10am."
She couldn't remember the last time she'd fixated so much on six little words. Especially six little words that in a different context would have been perfectly non-threatening and perhaps welcome. Not that she knew if they were exactly unwelcome, either. She hadn't known what to expect when she agreed to meet Shin at the museum but now she knew she was even more confused than ever. What the hell was going on in his head? Or in hers for that matter?
She was still pondering this when she heard someone call out her name. She turned around to find Joon Young sitting on the curb.
She turned away and groaned. Did she really need this? She was stressed enough as it was. She took a deep breath and went into stealth mode. Maybe, just maybe if she pretended not to see him, he'd take the hint and go away. When she got closer to the building entrance, she picked up her pace and practically ran to it.
"Ji Won ah," she heard just as she was about to reach for the door.
"Ji Won ah! Ji Won ah! Ji Won!" he repeated loudly. "Ji Won ah, you're here! My beautiful Ji Won… Ji Won ah… Won-Won…."
One of her neighbor's gave her a weird look as he walked past her and she turned around and watched as Joon Young staggered towards her.
She shook her head in disgust and hissed. "You're drunk," she said redundantly. She took two steps back and leaned against the wall next to the door. "What do you want?" she asked, scrunching her nose. Even if she'd been in a bar, she doubted it would have reeked so much of alcohol.
Joon Young smiled brightly as she walked to her. "Wonnie, I'm so glad to see you," he said, reaching for her. She stepped aside to avoid his touch and he kept staggering till he hit the door. "Wonniebabybooboo…"
Ji Won grimaced. In the years she'd known him, she'd only seen him drunk a handful of times and never in those times had he taken to calling her ridiculous pet names. She sighed. Whatever was going on with him, it was obviously something awful and even though she didn't want to, she couldn't help but care. She lowered her voice. "Joon Young, what do you want?"
He pointed at the door. "Let's go in and talk," he said, slurring his words.
She shook her head. "Say what you want to say here."
He slumped against the door and slid down to the ground. "Wonnie…."
***
Ji Won stood over Joon Young's body sprawled across her couch. Shortly after she'd dragged him into the apartment, he'd fallen on it and passed out.
She sighed as she knelt beside his body. Why did she have to spend her evening taking care of a drunk ex? It wasn't like she had a whole bunch of things planned but babysitting Joon Young was certainly not on the agenda. She thought of calling his dad or one of his friends to pick him up but she thought better of it. Joon Young could be quite proud and if she let someone get him, she knew that he'd be very embarrassed the next morning.
She smiled to herself as she held onto his left leg and took off the shoe. How sad was it that even through all he'd put her through, she still cared about his feelings? She didn't care about him the way she had that evening she'd agreed to be his wife but they'd been together for a long time and on most of those days, he'd made her happy. Very happy. And even though things had ended badly, looking at him breathing softly, looking just like the man she'd been in love with, she was surprised to discover that she no longer regretted all the years they'd spent together. They'd made a lot of pleasant memories together and even though she could no longer treasure them close to her heart, she still couldn't help but think of them fondly, after all, as far as she was concerned, their love had been real and there was no point thinking of that love as wasted.
She stood up and grabbed the blanket she'd pulled out of the closet. And as she placed it over him, she couldn't help but notice that he looked like he'd lost at least ten pounds since she'd seen him that fateful day at the restaurant.
She grabbed a pillow, placed it under his head then stood up straight and turned around. As she walked to the kitchen to find something to eat, she realized that after all was said and done, no matter what happened in the future, above it all, she wished him a happy life.
***
Ji Won woke up to the sound of the shower running and Joon Young humming. Disoriented, she automatically smiled till she remembered what year it was and what had transpired the previous night. Joon Young thought he had far more singing talent than he actually possessed so Ji Won had woken up far too many times to the sound of him singing at the top of his lungs and apparently, that aspect of his personality still remained. She got off her bed, threw on her robe and as she walked towards her bedroom door, she slowly picked up the scent of cooked bacon. She didn't even have to open her door to know that she'd walk over to her dinning table and find two place settings and a plate of bacon and another filled with spicy scrambled eggs. It had been a Joon Young staple and apparently that was another thing about him that hadn't changed.
She walked around her bedroom at the same moment Joon Young walked out in nothing but a towel wrapped around his waist.
"Good morning," he said cheerfully.
Ji Won nodded and looked away. "Good morning to you too."
"I see you still have my towel," he said, tapping his waist.
"It's not yours," she replied walking past him.
"But I'm the only that ever uses it."
She stopped walking and turned her head. She wasn't in the mood for a trip down memory lane. "Are you sure?" she asked and after missing a beat and letting that sink in, resumed walking till she was at the dinning table.
"You didn't have to do this," she said, staring down at the table.
"It's only breakfast – no big deal. It's just like old times, don't you think?" he asked before disappearing back into the shower to get dressed.
A few minutes later, he was out and dressed in his previous day's clothing. After apologizing for his drunken behavior, he looked around the room. "I really miss this apartment," he said, walking over to Ji Won who was sitting at the dinning table staring at the untouched food. "I'm hungry." He pulled out a chair and sat down. "It's funny," he said, reaching for one of the plates, "but my eggs always taste better here."
Ji Won watched him dish himself some food and after a few moments, said, "What do you want, Joon Young?"
"You," he said, before laughing uneasily. Then the smile disappeared from his face. "I want you back, Ji Won."
She folded her arms across her chest. "You can't be serious," she hissed, looking directly into his eyes.
He looked away and picked up his fork. "I'm dead serious. Doesn't this feel like old times? Don't you want this again? We've both had our fun so let's get back together," he said before scooping some scrambled eggs into his mouth. He smiled at her as he chewed his food.
Ji Won sighed. Did he really think that his charm still worked on her? How couldn't he see something that was so obvious to her? How couldn't he see that he was wasting his time?
He kept smiling at her but when all he got back were blank stares, he dropped the act. "I lost two contracts yesterday," he suddenly said solemnly. He looked uneasy as he picked up a slice of bacon.
"I'm sorry about that."
"One moment I was in my office talking to my former client and the next moment I was sitting at your doorstep. If you asked me what happened in between, I couldn't say." He paused to take a sip of orange juice. "All these months… I've not been myself. And it's because we're not together, Ji Won."
"You left me standing at the altar, Joon Young. You didn't even bother to show up or call me. You just left me standing there and sent a message through your friend. That's why we are not together."
He lowered his eyes. "It was a mistake that I'll regret for the rest of my life. But I love you. When I saw you with that guy," he said, his voice cracking, "I was so disgusted. I couldn't believe what you'd done but now I know I pushed you to him. Now, I understand that it's all my fault." He lifted his eyelids and looked directly into her eyes. "After all this time, I still love you."
"I don't love you, though."
"Stop trying to hurt me. We were in love together, remember? So I know exactly how much you loved me and I know it's not that easy for you to forget it."
"I haven't forgotten but I don't want it anymore." She leaned back into her chair and began to rock it.
"Because of that guy?" he asked, avoiding her eyes.
"No. Because you left me standing at the altar, Joon Young."
He looked up at her face and in a small voice said, "Can't you forgive me for that?"
Ji Won didn't think the question was worthy of a response.
"If you really loved me, you'd forgive me."
"If you really loved me, you'd have married me," she countered.
"I wasn't ready then, but I'm ready now. I was too stupid to see what I was sacrificing then but now I know that I need you in my life," he said in a pleading tone. He reached across and placed his palm over her hand which was laying on the table. "Please take me back." He looked around the room and smiled. "Don't you like how this feels? Seeing you first thing in the morning.... It feels great eating next to you and seeing you with your hair all tousled up wearing a battered old t-shirt with holes in it." He chuckled. "Let's get back together."
Ji Won covered his hand with her other hand and looked him directly in the eye. "Let's not talk about this anymore, okay? I'm never getting back with you so let this discussion end here forever." She took a deep breath in then patted his hand like a teacher would do to a 2nd grader. "Why don't you finish your breakfast while I go and take a shower? And oh, I have some things for you."
***
Ji Won played with the huge square cut diamond ring between her fingers and scoffed. At one point, she'd found it exquisite but now it was bordering on gaudy. She'd initially planned on returning it along with the other things Joon Young had left in her apartment but at the last minute, had decided against it.
She realized that she might be considered petty for holding onto the ring especially as returning it would also cut any ties that she might have with him, but on the other hand, she just didn't feel that he deserved to get it back. Why should he be able to return the ring and recoup some losses for an engagement he'd broken? She didn't plan on actually doing anything with it, but for now, the ring could keep on occupying the top drawer of her dressing table. She looked at it one more time before tossing it in its usual place.
Joon Young had only just left but when she walked into her living room, she noticed that he'd forgotten to take the jacket he'd worn the previous night so she quickly picked it up, grabbed her phone and ran out of her apartment.
***
Shin stifled a yawn as he tried to find a radio station that played music that made sense. He didn't consider himself a stiff old fuddy-duddy but he sometimes wondered if the youth of today were hearing impaired.
He was still searching for a station when he noticed a figure walk out of Ji Won's building. Since he was well aware of her penchant for earliness, he'd parked outside her apartment at around 9:25 am to surprise her. When he saw that it was a man walking out, he almost looked away till he realized that there was something familiar about him. He was still racking his brain trying to come up with a connection when he saw the man answer his phone then turn around and shortly after, when he saw him run up to the woman walking out of the building with a jacket in her hand, his heart stopped.
Chapter 18
Chapter 18
Ji Won squinted to get a better look at the person sitting in the parked car. She probably wouldn't have noticed him if he hadn't turned the engine on just as she was walking back to her building.
"Shin?" she whispered when she recognized him. Inexplicably, she suddenly felt self-conscious about her bare face and untidy hair. She looked heavenward and said a silent prayer thanking God that she was no longer in her ratty t-shirt and shorts. Then she looked back at the car and grunted in annoyance. What was wrong with her? And why did she suddenly care about looking good to him?
In defiance, she ran her fingers through her hair, roughening it up a bit but as she slowly walked over to him, she succumbed to vanity and finger combed her hair, hoping she looked presentable. Taking a deep breath, she knocked at the car window. "Hey," she said as he unwound it. She smiled at him but after seeing a mental image of herself looking like a fool, relaxed her cheek muscles.
"Hey," Shin echoed, not turning to look at her. He'd contemplated driving away but once she spotted him, he knew he'd been trapped. But he was still mad at her. So very mad.
"What are you doing here?" She asking loudly, titling her head away so that he couldn't get a full view of her face. "Didn't we agree on 10 o'clock?"
"We did."
"So you're just early?" she said in a sing-song voice. Then to her amazement, she giggled. She shut her eyes tightly in embarrassment. What was wrong with her?
"I guess so."
His tone snapped her back to reality. "You guess so?"
He shrugged and just kept looking ahead of him.
Ji Won glanced over to see if there was anything interesting occupying his attention but after confirming there was nothing, she frowned and looked back down at him. "Is everything alright?"
"Why wouldn't it be?"
She stood there for a moment and tried to figure out if he was bipolar or something. It was only a day since he'd been so apologetic about everything and now he was acting so cold? "Has something come up? Is that why you're here now? You can't go anymore?"
"I don't know," he replied honestly.
"You don't know?" she repeated in amazement.
Shin looked at her for the first time since she'd approached his car. Then he hissed and looked away. Why did she have to be so damn beautiful? She looked exactly as he'd imagined she would have if he'd woken up next to her that morning in Aruba. He sighed and shook his head. He definitely hated that she was back with her ex but on the other hand, he had to be rational. It wasn't like they were dating so she had absolutely no obligations to him and she could very well date anyone she wanted to but that realization did nothing to loosen the knot of betrayal lying in the pit of his stomach. He took a deep breath in – he had to be rational. Or at least, mature. He'd been the one to invite her out so he had to see it through. "I'll wait here for you."
Ji Won scoffed. "If you don't want to go, it's fine. I mean, I don't even know where I'm going. You're the one who just randomly asked me to come out with you today so that we can work on your writer's block but if you want to cancel, it's more than fine by me. I have a lot of work to do anyway."
"We should go."
"Don't do me any favors. Because you really don't have to force yourself if you've changed your mind. You can probably solve your writing problems alone."
Shin sucked in some air. "Please, let's go. I'll wait here for you."
***
"Congratulations," a petite lady with a pixie cut said as she hugged Shin.
After driving for what seemed like centuries, driving past the sign that read, "Welcome to Incheon," with only the sound of the radio keeping them company, Shin had stopped at a modest but inviting house. Not knowing what sort of response she'd receive, Ji Won hadn't asked where they were or why they were even there. All she did was question her sanity for jumping into his car in the first place. He was clearly unstable and she should have known better. Who invites someone on a trip but doesn't say anything to them on their entire drive there?
Shin looked down at his friend in confusion. "Congratulations? Aren't you the ones celebrating your anniversary?"
The lady stepped back and laughed as a tall, beefy guy stepped over to her and wrapped his arm over her shoulder. "Yeah, but that's not as great as you finally moving on," she said, smiling warmly at Ji Won.
Ji Won furrowed her brows and looked from the lady to Shin. Huh?
Shin was equally confused so he asked his friend to elaborate.
"You know when—" Her words were cut short by a sharp nudge from her husband. "—she-who-shall-not-be-named left? You kinda became a slut. Remember that after going through all the women in town, you started trying it with us? You even hit on me!"
"I didn't go through every woman in town. Stop exaggerating. And okay, for about five minutes, while wearing my extremely thick beer goggles, I thought you were cute. Are you going to hang this over my head for the rest of my life?"
"Yes," she said earnestly. Then she broke into laughter. "But you know what? After all these years, I'm glad to finally see you taking a relationship seriously." She turned to Ji Won. "You must be one hell of woman for him to bring you all the way from Seoul to meet us today. And you look like a woman with a brain." She turned to Shin. "You've really grown up." Then she walked over to Ji Won and took her hand. "So, tell me everything. Where did you guys meet? How long have you been together? Will we be hearing wedding bells anytime soon?"
Ji Won gently took the lady's hand off hers and stepped back. "I think you might have the wrong idea. I'm not his girlfriend – I'm his editor."
"No, you're not." She turned to Shin. "Isn't your editor a man?"
Shin nodded. "But she's editing a different book."
She knitted her brows in confusion. "Then if you're his editor, what are you doing here?"
Ji Won shook her head. "I honestly don't know."
The lady narrowed her eyes and looked from Ji Won to Shin. There definitely was something fishy because she was sensing far more than a professional relationship between them. She smiled as an idea popped into her head. She cleared her throat and to Ji Won said, "But you're single, right?"
"What does that have to do with anything?"
"Nothing, really. But are you single? Do you have a boyfriend? Someone you're dating?"
Ji Won looked around and saw all eyes trained on her curiously, although Shins appeared to have enough intensity to punch holes through her. After ignoring her for so long, why did he suddenly care about anything she had to say?
"Miss, you might want to answer Ri Na because she's not going to let it go," the lady's husband adviced in an amused tone.
"It's true. Are you single? Do you have a boyfriend?"
Ji Won shook her head in annoyance. "No."
"No as in, you are not single or that you don't have a boyfriend?"
She groaned. "I don't have a boyfriend."
"What about someone you've just started dating? Maybe someone you think is nice but it's not yet serious?"
Ji Won sighed. "I'm as single as the day I was born," she snapped.
Ri Na nodded with satisfaction. "What about you, Shin? Are you single?"
"Mind your business, Ri Na," he said even though his voice was a lot softer than the words demanded.
Ji Won was a little taken aback by the sudden change in his mood.
"Do you find him attractive?" Ri Na asked Ji Won.
"Who?"
"Shin. The guy you came with."
"What?"
"There's no way you can't see that he's totally hot, right? When he joined our school, all the girls went gaga for him."
"Bully," Shin said, calling his friend by his high school nickname, "control your wife." He knew he should be annoyed by Ri Na's meddling but this was one time he was actually grateful that she loved poking her nose in other people's business.
After rolling her eyes at Shin, Ri Na pressed on. "So as I was saying, do you find him attractive?"
Ji Won could already feel her cheeks reddening. She really wanted to tell this annoying little grunt to shove a stick in her as.s but she knew she had to play it cool. If she looked the least bit affected by the questions, she could tell that Ri Na would only make things worse. She glanced at Shin before saying, "He's not ugly."
"Good. And Shin, do you—?"
"Yes," Shin quickly interjected.
The crowd erupted in a chorus of ooohs and ahhs.
At this point, the blood was practically gushing to Ji Won's cheeks.
"So, if he were to ask you out, would you say yes?"
She groaned. "God, what is this?" she asked under her breath.
"Is that a yes?"
Her eyes traveled around the room and when they landed on Shin, she saw him looking at everything but her. Why would she want to date such an annoying guy?
"We don't have all day."
Ji Won sighed loudly. "I don't know." She knew that saying yes wouldn't be the smart thing to do but saying no would only bring about more questions and she was already tired of having the spotlight on her.
"Cool," Ri Na said, nodding and smiling.
"What are you so happy about? She said she doesn't know," Bully said with a smirk.
"Exactly. A double negative. I do not no. The 'not' and the 'no' cancel each other out."
All the spectators burst into laughter. Everyone including Ji Won and Shin.
***
"Single?" a voice said just as Ji Won was about to bite into her kebab.
She turned to her side to see a man smiling at her. He was about her height and had a baby face she was sure hid his true age.
"So you are single? There's no ring on your finger," he said, pointing to it.
Ji Won dropped her kebab stick on her plate and turned to him. "I'm single. Weren't you here for my public humiliation?" She wasn't really one for making mundane conversations with strangers but what else could a person do at a party they weren't even invited to?
He chuckled. "Yeah, but I just wanted to confirm it. Because you know, single girls are almost extinct in these parts."
"You don't say."
"I'm dead serious. It's easier to find a leprechaun carrying a pot of gold than a single girl over 21."
Ji Won smiled. "Well, I guess that means you should look for one under 21."
He looked away in mock exasperation. "Just my luck. The one cute single I see thinks I'm a pervert."
She laughed. "Of course I don't. I'm just giving you some friendly advice."
"Ah. So I've made a new friend." He stretched his hand out. "I'm Chun Hee, by the way. Ri Na's older brother-in-law."
Ji Won took his hand and shook it. "Nice to meet you."
They made a bit more small talk before Chun Hee watched ahead as Ri Na walked across the yard with some drinks in her hand then shook his head. "When Bully brought her home to meet the family, we all begged him not to marry her," he said, taking his eyes off her and looking back at Ji Won.
"Why?"
"Because she doesn't know when to shut up."
She laughed.
"I'm serious. We can no longer have painless holiday dinners where we all eat in silence and ignore each other. No. She insists on talking and asking questions about things we don't want to discuss."
"Well, that's a good thing, right? It can help you guys get closer."
"No," he said, shaking his head vehemently. "Not when every dinner feels like a support group meeting. Hello everyone," he said, his voice suddenly getting nasal, "it's been exactly eight months, six days and twelve hours since my last drink."
Ji Won laughed. "It can't be that bad."
"Don't take it personal," Ji Won heard Shin say about two seconds before he was standing next to her. She suddenly stood straight and felt her body tense up. After the conversation with Ri Na, even though he hadn't spoken to her, she'd caught him staring at her at different moments during the day.
"Take what personal?" Chun Hee asked.
"Not you. I was talking to her," he said, turning to Ji Won.
She gave him a sidelong glance. "Take what personal?"
"His flirtations. He flirts with everyone."
Ji Won grimaced. Now he was being mean? Bipolar man was back.
"I really don't appreciate you tarnishing my image to her. Ji Won ssi, I'm not a flirt."
"Are you really denying it? Are you going to pretend you don't flirt with everyone? Heck, didn't you stalk me my first year in high school?"
"Hello, all the girls were after you so I was just making sure I was around to pick up all the broken hearts."
Ji Won let out a sigh of relief when she realized that Shin had been only joking. She turned to Chun Hee. "So other than breaking hearts, how else was he in high school?"
"Quiet. Withdrawn. So secretive. Always writing something in his notebook. The rumor was that he was constantly rating the girls he'd slept with."
"Huh?" Ji Won said.
"You know, like he'd be walking around and suddenly remember that Kang Da Hae was a really sloppy kisser so he'd quickly write it down so as not to forget it."
Ji Won burst out laughing. "Tell me you're making this up."
"It's enough, Chun Hee yah," Shin voice boomed. He couldn't understand how this knucklehead didn't know when to shut up. "Thanks for the trip down memory lane but I'm sure there's something else you can be doing other than bothering Miss Na over here."
"No, it's cool. He's not bothering me," she said, laughing. Shin obviously didn't enjoy being teased but she was loving it. Besides, it was pay back for what she'd had to endure earlier. "Chun Hee ssi, tell me more."
Chun Hee saw the look on Shin's face and knew that it was in his best interest to disappear. "Miss Na, it's been nice talking to you but I need to do something," he said before turning around.
As he walked away, Ji Won could already feel her body becoming more tense. They stood in silence for some uncomfortable seconds before she decided that she probably needed another drink.
She was about to say something to that effect when he said, "I guess you're just one of those people."
She frowned. Not again. He now wanted to pick a fight? "Which people?"
"One of those who gets along with everyone. I think Chun Hee is going to run out and get the biggest ring he can afford."
She laughed. "Yeah, just what I need right now – another proposal."
Shin hid a smile. She was definitely not back with her ex and it was embarrassing how good that made him feel. So good that he wanted to pick her up and give her a twirl.
"But," she continued, "I doubt he'll get a ring because after what happened earlier, it's pretty clear that I've been assigned as your wife."
He laughed. "Sorry about that. Ri Na can be so obnoxious at times."
"Which is why you hit on her when you were drunk?" she teased.
"With drunk being the operative word."
She shook her head and laughed again. "Is this somehow helping with your writer's block? Because, as much as this has been an interesting day, I still don't see how it's helping you."
"Well, coming back here will definitely help me trigger any memories I might have forgotten about this place. And having you here means that I'll constantly have to think about writing."
"It's comforting to know that when you see me all you can think about is writing," she said, not really liking the sound of it.
"If only that were true," he said with a sigh. He scratched the back of his head and smiled at her uncertainly.
"Yeah?" was all she could come up with.
Ji Won reluctantly glanced at him then looked away. Maybe he wasn't the only bipolar person around because she couldn't understand how the mood could go from being comfortable to uncomfortable in less than a nanosecond.
"Well," she said, taking a deep breath in, "I need to get another drink."
"Okay. But I was ordered to get you to come into the house and play Clue so let's go in when you've gotten your drink."
***
"So your name really is Shin?" Ji Won asked as soon as they were back on the road. The game of Clue had been more fun than she'd anticipated especially as she was playing with a bunch of strangers but watching Shin in his element, especially listening to his deductive reasoning had given her an insight to another side of his personality. "All your friends call you Shin so it must be your name."
He rolled his eyes. "Of course it's my name."
"But how so? Isn't your birth name Pil Suh?"
"It sure is."
"Then how did you get Shin out of it?"
"Hmm… should I tell you? It's kind of a secret but since you're my editor, I guess you deserve to know."
"Uh, okay."
"Back in my mid teens, I worked at a local coffee shop. One busy day, I mistakenly spilled scalding hot coffee on a gentleman's chest and he had to be rushed to the hospital. Naturally, I offered to make it up to him in any way I could so he asked me to visit his home every Wednesday evening. One thing led to another and we became good friends. He encouraged me a lot and began to read some of my stories and he's pretty much the reason I'm a writer today."
Ji Won nodded. "I see. And his name was Shin?"
"Bingo," he said, pointing at her. "I kind of took the name to honor him."
She thought about it for a moment. "But if he's the reason you're writing, shouldn't your pen name be Shin and not Pil Suh?"
He chuckled. "That would make more sense, wouldn't it?"
She frowned. "Meaning what? That you just made up that story?"
He laughed. "Pretty much."
She hit his arm playfully. "You know your stupid stories suck, don't you?"
"Is that why you don't read my novels?" he asked half-jokingly.
"Whatever," she said, not knowing what else to say. "Anyway, are you going to tell me the real reason you're called Shin?"
He shook his head. "Not today."
"Not today? Blech. You can be so annoying, Yoon Pil Suh."
"I can, can't I?" he joked as he hit the accelarator. They were only a few minutes away from their next destination and suddenly, he was feeling rather anxious.
Ji Won squinted to get a better look at the person sitting in the parked car. She probably wouldn't have noticed him if he hadn't turned the engine on just as she was walking back to her building.
"Shin?" she whispered when she recognized him. Inexplicably, she suddenly felt self-conscious about her bare face and untidy hair. She looked heavenward and said a silent prayer thanking God that she was no longer in her ratty t-shirt and shorts. Then she looked back at the car and grunted in annoyance. What was wrong with her? And why did she suddenly care about looking good to him?
In defiance, she ran her fingers through her hair, roughening it up a bit but as she slowly walked over to him, she succumbed to vanity and finger combed her hair, hoping she looked presentable. Taking a deep breath, she knocked at the car window. "Hey," she said as he unwound it. She smiled at him but after seeing a mental image of herself looking like a fool, relaxed her cheek muscles.
"Hey," Shin echoed, not turning to look at her. He'd contemplated driving away but once she spotted him, he knew he'd been trapped. But he was still mad at her. So very mad.
"What are you doing here?" She asking loudly, titling her head away so that he couldn't get a full view of her face. "Didn't we agree on 10 o'clock?"
"We did."
"So you're just early?" she said in a sing-song voice. Then to her amazement, she giggled. She shut her eyes tightly in embarrassment. What was wrong with her?
"I guess so."
His tone snapped her back to reality. "You guess so?"
He shrugged and just kept looking ahead of him.
Ji Won glanced over to see if there was anything interesting occupying his attention but after confirming there was nothing, she frowned and looked back down at him. "Is everything alright?"
"Why wouldn't it be?"
She stood there for a moment and tried to figure out if he was bipolar or something. It was only a day since he'd been so apologetic about everything and now he was acting so cold? "Has something come up? Is that why you're here now? You can't go anymore?"
"I don't know," he replied honestly.
"You don't know?" she repeated in amazement.
Shin looked at her for the first time since she'd approached his car. Then he hissed and looked away. Why did she have to be so damn beautiful? She looked exactly as he'd imagined she would have if he'd woken up next to her that morning in Aruba. He sighed and shook his head. He definitely hated that she was back with her ex but on the other hand, he had to be rational. It wasn't like they were dating so she had absolutely no obligations to him and she could very well date anyone she wanted to but that realization did nothing to loosen the knot of betrayal lying in the pit of his stomach. He took a deep breath in – he had to be rational. Or at least, mature. He'd been the one to invite her out so he had to see it through. "I'll wait here for you."
Ji Won scoffed. "If you don't want to go, it's fine. I mean, I don't even know where I'm going. You're the one who just randomly asked me to come out with you today so that we can work on your writer's block but if you want to cancel, it's more than fine by me. I have a lot of work to do anyway."
"We should go."
"Don't do me any favors. Because you really don't have to force yourself if you've changed your mind. You can probably solve your writing problems alone."
Shin sucked in some air. "Please, let's go. I'll wait here for you."
***
"Congratulations," a petite lady with a pixie cut said as she hugged Shin.
After driving for what seemed like centuries, driving past the sign that read, "Welcome to Incheon," with only the sound of the radio keeping them company, Shin had stopped at a modest but inviting house. Not knowing what sort of response she'd receive, Ji Won hadn't asked where they were or why they were even there. All she did was question her sanity for jumping into his car in the first place. He was clearly unstable and she should have known better. Who invites someone on a trip but doesn't say anything to them on their entire drive there?
Shin looked down at his friend in confusion. "Congratulations? Aren't you the ones celebrating your anniversary?"
The lady stepped back and laughed as a tall, beefy guy stepped over to her and wrapped his arm over her shoulder. "Yeah, but that's not as great as you finally moving on," she said, smiling warmly at Ji Won.
Ji Won furrowed her brows and looked from the lady to Shin. Huh?
Shin was equally confused so he asked his friend to elaborate.
"You know when—" Her words were cut short by a sharp nudge from her husband. "—she-who-shall-not-be-named left? You kinda became a slut. Remember that after going through all the women in town, you started trying it with us? You even hit on me!"
"I didn't go through every woman in town. Stop exaggerating. And okay, for about five minutes, while wearing my extremely thick beer goggles, I thought you were cute. Are you going to hang this over my head for the rest of my life?"
"Yes," she said earnestly. Then she broke into laughter. "But you know what? After all these years, I'm glad to finally see you taking a relationship seriously." She turned to Ji Won. "You must be one hell of woman for him to bring you all the way from Seoul to meet us today. And you look like a woman with a brain." She turned to Shin. "You've really grown up." Then she walked over to Ji Won and took her hand. "So, tell me everything. Where did you guys meet? How long have you been together? Will we be hearing wedding bells anytime soon?"
Ji Won gently took the lady's hand off hers and stepped back. "I think you might have the wrong idea. I'm not his girlfriend – I'm his editor."
"No, you're not." She turned to Shin. "Isn't your editor a man?"
Shin nodded. "But she's editing a different book."
She knitted her brows in confusion. "Then if you're his editor, what are you doing here?"
Ji Won shook her head. "I honestly don't know."
The lady narrowed her eyes and looked from Ji Won to Shin. There definitely was something fishy because she was sensing far more than a professional relationship between them. She smiled as an idea popped into her head. She cleared her throat and to Ji Won said, "But you're single, right?"
"What does that have to do with anything?"
"Nothing, really. But are you single? Do you have a boyfriend? Someone you're dating?"
Ji Won looked around and saw all eyes trained on her curiously, although Shins appeared to have enough intensity to punch holes through her. After ignoring her for so long, why did he suddenly care about anything she had to say?
"Miss, you might want to answer Ri Na because she's not going to let it go," the lady's husband adviced in an amused tone.
"It's true. Are you single? Do you have a boyfriend?"
Ji Won shook her head in annoyance. "No."
"No as in, you are not single or that you don't have a boyfriend?"
She groaned. "I don't have a boyfriend."
"What about someone you've just started dating? Maybe someone you think is nice but it's not yet serious?"
Ji Won sighed. "I'm as single as the day I was born," she snapped.
Ri Na nodded with satisfaction. "What about you, Shin? Are you single?"
"Mind your business, Ri Na," he said even though his voice was a lot softer than the words demanded.
Ji Won was a little taken aback by the sudden change in his mood.
"Do you find him attractive?" Ri Na asked Ji Won.
"Who?"
"Shin. The guy you came with."
"What?"
"There's no way you can't see that he's totally hot, right? When he joined our school, all the girls went gaga for him."
"Bully," Shin said, calling his friend by his high school nickname, "control your wife." He knew he should be annoyed by Ri Na's meddling but this was one time he was actually grateful that she loved poking her nose in other people's business.
After rolling her eyes at Shin, Ri Na pressed on. "So as I was saying, do you find him attractive?"
Ji Won could already feel her cheeks reddening. She really wanted to tell this annoying little grunt to shove a stick in her as.s but she knew she had to play it cool. If she looked the least bit affected by the questions, she could tell that Ri Na would only make things worse. She glanced at Shin before saying, "He's not ugly."
"Good. And Shin, do you—?"
"Yes," Shin quickly interjected.
The crowd erupted in a chorus of ooohs and ahhs.
At this point, the blood was practically gushing to Ji Won's cheeks.
"So, if he were to ask you out, would you say yes?"
She groaned. "God, what is this?" she asked under her breath.
"Is that a yes?"
Her eyes traveled around the room and when they landed on Shin, she saw him looking at everything but her. Why would she want to date such an annoying guy?
"We don't have all day."
Ji Won sighed loudly. "I don't know." She knew that saying yes wouldn't be the smart thing to do but saying no would only bring about more questions and she was already tired of having the spotlight on her.
"Cool," Ri Na said, nodding and smiling.
"What are you so happy about? She said she doesn't know," Bully said with a smirk.
"Exactly. A double negative. I do not no. The 'not' and the 'no' cancel each other out."
All the spectators burst into laughter. Everyone including Ji Won and Shin.
***
"Single?" a voice said just as Ji Won was about to bite into her kebab.
She turned to her side to see a man smiling at her. He was about her height and had a baby face she was sure hid his true age.
"So you are single? There's no ring on your finger," he said, pointing to it.
Ji Won dropped her kebab stick on her plate and turned to him. "I'm single. Weren't you here for my public humiliation?" She wasn't really one for making mundane conversations with strangers but what else could a person do at a party they weren't even invited to?
He chuckled. "Yeah, but I just wanted to confirm it. Because you know, single girls are almost extinct in these parts."
"You don't say."
"I'm dead serious. It's easier to find a leprechaun carrying a pot of gold than a single girl over 21."
Ji Won smiled. "Well, I guess that means you should look for one under 21."
He looked away in mock exasperation. "Just my luck. The one cute single I see thinks I'm a pervert."
She laughed. "Of course I don't. I'm just giving you some friendly advice."
"Ah. So I've made a new friend." He stretched his hand out. "I'm Chun Hee, by the way. Ri Na's older brother-in-law."
Ji Won took his hand and shook it. "Nice to meet you."
They made a bit more small talk before Chun Hee watched ahead as Ri Na walked across the yard with some drinks in her hand then shook his head. "When Bully brought her home to meet the family, we all begged him not to marry her," he said, taking his eyes off her and looking back at Ji Won.
"Why?"
"Because she doesn't know when to shut up."
She laughed.
"I'm serious. We can no longer have painless holiday dinners where we all eat in silence and ignore each other. No. She insists on talking and asking questions about things we don't want to discuss."
"Well, that's a good thing, right? It can help you guys get closer."
"No," he said, shaking his head vehemently. "Not when every dinner feels like a support group meeting. Hello everyone," he said, his voice suddenly getting nasal, "it's been exactly eight months, six days and twelve hours since my last drink."
Ji Won laughed. "It can't be that bad."
"Don't take it personal," Ji Won heard Shin say about two seconds before he was standing next to her. She suddenly stood straight and felt her body tense up. After the conversation with Ri Na, even though he hadn't spoken to her, she'd caught him staring at her at different moments during the day.
"Take what personal?" Chun Hee asked.
"Not you. I was talking to her," he said, turning to Ji Won.
She gave him a sidelong glance. "Take what personal?"
"His flirtations. He flirts with everyone."
Ji Won grimaced. Now he was being mean? Bipolar man was back.
"I really don't appreciate you tarnishing my image to her. Ji Won ssi, I'm not a flirt."
"Are you really denying it? Are you going to pretend you don't flirt with everyone? Heck, didn't you stalk me my first year in high school?"
"Hello, all the girls were after you so I was just making sure I was around to pick up all the broken hearts."
Ji Won let out a sigh of relief when she realized that Shin had been only joking. She turned to Chun Hee. "So other than breaking hearts, how else was he in high school?"
"Quiet. Withdrawn. So secretive. Always writing something in his notebook. The rumor was that he was constantly rating the girls he'd slept with."
"Huh?" Ji Won said.
"You know, like he'd be walking around and suddenly remember that Kang Da Hae was a really sloppy kisser so he'd quickly write it down so as not to forget it."
Ji Won burst out laughing. "Tell me you're making this up."
"It's enough, Chun Hee yah," Shin voice boomed. He couldn't understand how this knucklehead didn't know when to shut up. "Thanks for the trip down memory lane but I'm sure there's something else you can be doing other than bothering Miss Na over here."
"No, it's cool. He's not bothering me," she said, laughing. Shin obviously didn't enjoy being teased but she was loving it. Besides, it was pay back for what she'd had to endure earlier. "Chun Hee ssi, tell me more."
Chun Hee saw the look on Shin's face and knew that it was in his best interest to disappear. "Miss Na, it's been nice talking to you but I need to do something," he said before turning around.
As he walked away, Ji Won could already feel her body becoming more tense. They stood in silence for some uncomfortable seconds before she decided that she probably needed another drink.
She was about to say something to that effect when he said, "I guess you're just one of those people."
She frowned. Not again. He now wanted to pick a fight? "Which people?"
"One of those who gets along with everyone. I think Chun Hee is going to run out and get the biggest ring he can afford."
She laughed. "Yeah, just what I need right now – another proposal."
Shin hid a smile. She was definitely not back with her ex and it was embarrassing how good that made him feel. So good that he wanted to pick her up and give her a twirl.
"But," she continued, "I doubt he'll get a ring because after what happened earlier, it's pretty clear that I've been assigned as your wife."
He laughed. "Sorry about that. Ri Na can be so obnoxious at times."
"Which is why you hit on her when you were drunk?" she teased.
"With drunk being the operative word."
She shook her head and laughed again. "Is this somehow helping with your writer's block? Because, as much as this has been an interesting day, I still don't see how it's helping you."
"Well, coming back here will definitely help me trigger any memories I might have forgotten about this place. And having you here means that I'll constantly have to think about writing."
"It's comforting to know that when you see me all you can think about is writing," she said, not really liking the sound of it.
"If only that were true," he said with a sigh. He scratched the back of his head and smiled at her uncertainly.
"Yeah?" was all she could come up with.
Ji Won reluctantly glanced at him then looked away. Maybe he wasn't the only bipolar person around because she couldn't understand how the mood could go from being comfortable to uncomfortable in less than a nanosecond.
"Well," she said, taking a deep breath in, "I need to get another drink."
"Okay. But I was ordered to get you to come into the house and play Clue so let's go in when you've gotten your drink."
***
"So your name really is Shin?" Ji Won asked as soon as they were back on the road. The game of Clue had been more fun than she'd anticipated especially as she was playing with a bunch of strangers but watching Shin in his element, especially listening to his deductive reasoning had given her an insight to another side of his personality. "All your friends call you Shin so it must be your name."
He rolled his eyes. "Of course it's my name."
"But how so? Isn't your birth name Pil Suh?"
"It sure is."
"Then how did you get Shin out of it?"
"Hmm… should I tell you? It's kind of a secret but since you're my editor, I guess you deserve to know."
"Uh, okay."
"Back in my mid teens, I worked at a local coffee shop. One busy day, I mistakenly spilled scalding hot coffee on a gentleman's chest and he had to be rushed to the hospital. Naturally, I offered to make it up to him in any way I could so he asked me to visit his home every Wednesday evening. One thing led to another and we became good friends. He encouraged me a lot and began to read some of my stories and he's pretty much the reason I'm a writer today."
Ji Won nodded. "I see. And his name was Shin?"
"Bingo," he said, pointing at her. "I kind of took the name to honor him."
She thought about it for a moment. "But if he's the reason you're writing, shouldn't your pen name be Shin and not Pil Suh?"
He chuckled. "That would make more sense, wouldn't it?"
She frowned. "Meaning what? That you just made up that story?"
He laughed. "Pretty much."
She hit his arm playfully. "You know your stupid stories suck, don't you?"
"Is that why you don't read my novels?" he asked half-jokingly.
"Whatever," she said, not knowing what else to say. "Anyway, are you going to tell me the real reason you're called Shin?"
He shook his head. "Not today."
"Not today? Blech. You can be so annoying, Yoon Pil Suh."
"I can, can't I?" he joked as he hit the accelarator. They were only a few minutes away from their next destination and suddenly, he was feeling rather anxious.
Chapter 19
Living with Mr. Yoo was as uneventful as the first day I met him. My mom had left me alone in the cold, strange apartment and after what seemed like an eternity, I heard the sound of keys rattling at the other side of the door. Startled, I sprung to my feet out of both fear and curiosity and wondered which of the million scenarios I'd imagined in the hours I'd waited for him would come to pass. So when the door finally opened, with my bag held tightly against my chest, I held my breath and watched as a scraggly man walked into the apartment.
The first thing I noticed was that he was tall and thin with a very short crop and a full beard. For all the time I spent with him, I often wondered why he spent so much time ensuring that the hair on his head never grew past an inch but never spared a second for the beard that was so big it probably housed a colony of chicks. But then again, he seemed to dance to the beat of his own drum. On that first day, after walking into the apartment dressed in very dirty jeans and what had probably once been a white t-shirt, instead of introducing himself to me like most others would, he didn't even spare me a single glance. Instead, he headed straight into the bathroom and before I could figure out if he'd seen me or not, turned the shower on.
Surprised, I sat back on the floor and waited then ten minutes later, watched as he walked out of the bathroom in a pair of clean pajamas and walked into the kitchen to prepare himself some dinner. The entire scene was confusing. From his actions, it was obvious that he wasn't blind yet, he'd completely ignored me. What exactly did that mean? Did it somehow imply that he'd only grudgingly agreed to take me into his care? Had one of my least desirable scenarios come to pass? Now more frightened that I'd ever been, I was silently debating calling out to him when he suddenly plopped a plate of rice and vegetables at my feet.
"I'm sorry," he said, smiling down at me and showing off surprisingly white teeth. "That's all I have right now. I planned to get groceries today but I forgot. I'll try to get some meat this weekend. Please manage it," he pleaded kindly. And without waiting for a response, he sat next to me and dug into his food.
The rest of our days together didn't deviate much from our initial meeting. He wasn't one for small talk and only spoke when necessary. But even though he didn't say much, he was quite thoughtful because when he noticed that I liked to read, he went out of his way to bring discarded magazines and books he found at his workplace home for me. Over time, I got used to his personality and realized that he was so forgetful that if I wanted to have meat for dinner, I've have to walk over to the nearby market to buy some with the money he often remembered to give to me.
It was on one such day that I met the old, sturdy man who'd later change my life forever.
"Where are we now?" Ji Won asked as Shin pulled into the driveway of a moderately sized house.
"You'll see," he replied coyly as his foot hit the brakes.
"Whatever," she said, rolling her eyes and winding up the window.
Shin chuckled and did the same. Then he glanced at her and smiled to himself.
The conversation they'd shared during their car ride had been far more pleasant that he remembered and that had helped calm his nerves. His entire relationship with Ji Won thus far had been more than a little confusing and volatile but now, he was really beginning to feel like they'd turned a corner.
About a minute later, Ji Won had just stepped out of the car when the front door to the house opened and out walked a white-haired man with wire-rimmed glasses and a curious smile. Even though she'd never met the man, she instantly recognized him. She sighed and turned to Shin. "Why didn't you tell me we were coming to see your grandparents?"
"Oh, did I forget to mention it? I hope you don't mind," he said, avoiding her eyes.
Ji Won looked to him and then to the old man waiting patiently at the door and felt her heart race. For some inexplicable reason, she wanted to make a good impression on him and after silently cursing Shin for not warning her, glanced at her clothing and hoped that they were appropriate.
***
After mentally agreeing to suck it up and be satisfied with her clothing, Ji Won turned around and watched Shin open the trunk and pull out a gift bag. Her eyes widened in disbelief. "What the hell is that?"
Shin looked at the red and brown bag then back at her. "What does it look like?" he asked, slamming the trunk shut.
"Is it someone's birthday?" She marched over to him.
He nodded innocently and avoided her eyes. "Yeah, my grandmother. It's tomorrow."
"Wow," she said, rolling her eyes and walking in front of him. "Now, I look like a stingy bi.tch. Since you knew we were coming down here, you could at least have told me about it and given me the chance to get something." Yes, the lady was only her writer's grandmother but that didn't mean that she shouldn't be courteous, did it? She would probably have been able to write it off as a business expense. She glanced back at him and hissed in annoyance.
Shin giggled from behind her. "If it bothers you that much, I can add your name to the card."
She was about to respond with a cutting remark when she heard her phone ring. She excused herself and pulled out her phone and saw that it was her mother calling. Her heart skipped a beat as she stared at it for a few seconds while it rang, not sure of what to do next.
"Aren't you going to answer it?" He didn't even want to think of who it could be.
She took a deep breath in then flipped the phone open. Even though she knew she was going to get yelled at for not keeping their dinner date, she also realized it would be rude to not apologize to her mother. She'd avoided previous dinner dates because she was sure her mother was trying to fix her up with someone and had only been cornered into this one by her sister. And now that she'd unintentionally missed dinner, she was sure her mother wouldn't buy her excuse. Funny how the woman used to believe her lies but now, would probably not believe the truth. But what the heck? She was a grown woman and had to face the music somehow.
***
Shin's grandmother dropped the plate of roast chicken on the table and looked at the small spread of rice and vegetables next to it. "I wish you'd told me you were coming over this evening and especially that you were bringing a guest with you," she said for the umpteenth time. "If I'd known, I'd have prepared something better."
"Oh, I see," her husband said. "So you only cook good things when there are guests coming?"
She shrugged. "Isn't it obvious? Why bother going to great lengths for you when you'll eat anything?" she teased.
Ji Won smiled to herself. Moments like this always reminded her of the life she'd expected to lead with Joon Young and how she'd imagined they'd grow old together. Not that she could really picture him teasing her like that.
Shin father shook his head at his wife. "Instead of appreciating me, keep talking like that. Before you know it, you'll end up losing me to a beautiful young girl."
His wife scoffed and picked up his plate to serve him. "Not even in your dreams."
"You think I'm kidding?" he continued. "Beautiful young girls hit on me everyday. I'm still very attractive, you know?" He turned to Ji Won. "You think I'm attractive, don't you? Look at me properly," he said, lifting his chest and sitting up straight, "Don't you think I'm attractive? I'm probably your type, right?"
Suddenly brought into their bickering in a particularly odd way, Ji Won found herself speechless. She parted her lips but couldn't think of what would be the right thing to say. "Ehm…," she began.
Shin chuckled then touched her arm for support. "Just ignore him – he just loves to tease people and make them feel uncomfortable. I thought he was so weird when I first started living with him but he's just teasing. Ignore him."
Ji Won sank into her chair, relieved that she didn't have to respond.
"Yes, ignore him like I do," his wife said, placing his full plate in front of him. Then she pointed at the dishes. "Please dig in."
***
About 10 minutes into their dinner, Shin's grandfather put down his chopsticks and looked at his grandson. "So you thought I was weird?"
Shin chuckled and nodded. The moment those words had escaped his lips, he knew he'd have to explain himself at some point. "Of course I thought you were weird. What kind of man follows a little boy all around a food market? All you did was say hello to me then follow me around for about fifteen minutes. Who does that?"
"A weirdo," his grandmother supplied.
It was Shin's turn to put down his chopsticks. "And not only did you follow me that first time, you just happened to be at the market the next two times I was there, standing a few feet away staring at me. It was quite creepy and scary now that I think about it."
"I can imagine. But think about how I felt. Seeing you that first time was like being struck by lightning. Or maybe you can say, being hit by a meteorite and being transported to twenty-five years earlier. You were pretty much the spitting image of my son. There's no right way to react to that."
Shin flinched despite himself. Even though he felt he'd dealt with his abandonment issues, he still didn't like being compared to a man who'd done absolutely nothing for him in his life.
Ji Won noticed the slight change in his demeanor and finally understood why she'd been invited to share his private family moments with him. Maybe she was there to weed out topics he had yet to explore in his memoir… a topic like his father.
"But when you finally agreed to move here, I learned that you were nothing like Hee Chul," his grandfather mused.
Ji Won looked from grandfather to grandchild and recalled that part of the story. Apparently, unbeknownst to him, his grandfather had followed him one day and waited for Mr. Yoo to return from work. Unlike most normal people, instead of speaking with him that day, he'd stalked him for a few days before showing up at his workplace. As Shin wasn't present at any of these conversations, he was very shocked when about a month after meeting the old man, he learned he'd be living with him permanently. Shin had fought tooth and nail to not go home with the weird stranger but Mr. Yoo promised him that it would be for the best.
Shin grandmother reached over the table and touched Shin's cheek gently then smiled fondly at him. "At first I thought you were mute or just hadn't developed your language skills properly. You were so shy and didn't like to be around us. I think 'yes' and 'no' were the only words you spoke to me for about six months. And no matter how hard I tried to get to know you, you didn't open up."
"Halmoni, you're exaggerating," he said gruffly.
Ji Won turned to him and was shocked to see that he'd begun to blush furiously. So he knew how to be embarrassed? Yoon Pil Suh? What the heck?
"No, I'm serious. I was so worried and embarrassed and ashamed that someone I had given birth to was so heartless and had allowed his own flesh and blood to lead such a miserable life."
"It wasn't miserable," Shin defended. "It was different and probably wasn't ideal but I always felt loved. By my grandmother, by Aunt Oo Ra, by Uncle Bong Chol and even Mr. Yoo. And then, of course, by you guys," he said, waving his hand aimlessly. "So you see, it wasn't miserable." He picked up his glass of water and took a sip to wet his suddenly dry mouth. Even though it had been years, he still hated being pitied.
"No, it wasn't," his grandfather said with fake cheer. "It made you who you are today. A great man."
Shin laughed. "Hey, you don't have to take it too far."
His grandmother averted her eyes and fought to fight back tears. "No, it wasn't a miserable life," she said through a choked voice. Then she reached out and touched Shin's arm. "No, it wasn't miserable at all." It was something she'd been trying to reassure herself for over ten years and something she'd yet to fully believe.
Ji Won stared at her plate as the dinning room fell into uncomfortable silence. She put some rice in her mouth as she let the reality of what was being said sink in. She'd been far removed from his life story because she'd simply been treating it as words on paper. Paragraphs in a chapter. As pages in a book. She'd solely been viewing the story from an editor's point of view but now that it had been both humanized and validated, now that she suddenly realized that everything he'd written had really happened to him, her heart suddenly felt heavy with sadness and regret. And pity about the happy childhood he'd never gotten to experience. She glanced at him then looked back at her plate. Poor thing, she thought.
"Harbuji, remember how you used to drop mathematical equations in front of me and order me to solve them?"
His grandfather laughed. "You constantly had your nose in your notebook writing and writing so I wondered if you'd inherited my genes and were a genius and since we didn't think you were quite ready for school, that was my way of investigating it."
"And the result was…?" his wife asked, smiling and leading him to the punchline.
"And the result was that you weren't a genius at all! At your age, you should have at least been able to do long division!"
Shin pouted. "Hey, it's not my fault that I'd never been to school!"
They all laughed. "An excuse that would have been valid if you'd understood it after attending school," his grandmother joked.
"Whatever, men. Why do I need to learn long division when I can just use a calculator?"
Ji Won sat quietly, smiling and laughing as she watched the friendly family banter. Seeing Shin as a fully rounded person, not simply as this writer who'd lied to her and gotten on her nerves, she suddenly found herself developing some kind of respect for him. For the man who'd managed to create a full, productive life out of a history that could have made him a bitter, unhappy adult wielding an axe to grind against the world. And as she watched him laugh and tease his grandmother, she inexplicably felt proud of him. No, that wasn't it. She wasn't proud of him but instead, proud to know him. Or was she just finally happy to have had the opportunity to work with him? She couldn't quite put her finger on it but she definitely felt glad to be there. With them.
The first thing I noticed was that he was tall and thin with a very short crop and a full beard. For all the time I spent with him, I often wondered why he spent so much time ensuring that the hair on his head never grew past an inch but never spared a second for the beard that was so big it probably housed a colony of chicks. But then again, he seemed to dance to the beat of his own drum. On that first day, after walking into the apartment dressed in very dirty jeans and what had probably once been a white t-shirt, instead of introducing himself to me like most others would, he didn't even spare me a single glance. Instead, he headed straight into the bathroom and before I could figure out if he'd seen me or not, turned the shower on.
Surprised, I sat back on the floor and waited then ten minutes later, watched as he walked out of the bathroom in a pair of clean pajamas and walked into the kitchen to prepare himself some dinner. The entire scene was confusing. From his actions, it was obvious that he wasn't blind yet, he'd completely ignored me. What exactly did that mean? Did it somehow imply that he'd only grudgingly agreed to take me into his care? Had one of my least desirable scenarios come to pass? Now more frightened that I'd ever been, I was silently debating calling out to him when he suddenly plopped a plate of rice and vegetables at my feet.
"I'm sorry," he said, smiling down at me and showing off surprisingly white teeth. "That's all I have right now. I planned to get groceries today but I forgot. I'll try to get some meat this weekend. Please manage it," he pleaded kindly. And without waiting for a response, he sat next to me and dug into his food.
The rest of our days together didn't deviate much from our initial meeting. He wasn't one for small talk and only spoke when necessary. But even though he didn't say much, he was quite thoughtful because when he noticed that I liked to read, he went out of his way to bring discarded magazines and books he found at his workplace home for me. Over time, I got used to his personality and realized that he was so forgetful that if I wanted to have meat for dinner, I've have to walk over to the nearby market to buy some with the money he often remembered to give to me.
It was on one such day that I met the old, sturdy man who'd later change my life forever.
"Where are we now?" Ji Won asked as Shin pulled into the driveway of a moderately sized house.
"You'll see," he replied coyly as his foot hit the brakes.
"Whatever," she said, rolling her eyes and winding up the window.
Shin chuckled and did the same. Then he glanced at her and smiled to himself.
The conversation they'd shared during their car ride had been far more pleasant that he remembered and that had helped calm his nerves. His entire relationship with Ji Won thus far had been more than a little confusing and volatile but now, he was really beginning to feel like they'd turned a corner.
About a minute later, Ji Won had just stepped out of the car when the front door to the house opened and out walked a white-haired man with wire-rimmed glasses and a curious smile. Even though she'd never met the man, she instantly recognized him. She sighed and turned to Shin. "Why didn't you tell me we were coming to see your grandparents?"
"Oh, did I forget to mention it? I hope you don't mind," he said, avoiding her eyes.
Ji Won looked to him and then to the old man waiting patiently at the door and felt her heart race. For some inexplicable reason, she wanted to make a good impression on him and after silently cursing Shin for not warning her, glanced at her clothing and hoped that they were appropriate.
***
After mentally agreeing to suck it up and be satisfied with her clothing, Ji Won turned around and watched Shin open the trunk and pull out a gift bag. Her eyes widened in disbelief. "What the hell is that?"
Shin looked at the red and brown bag then back at her. "What does it look like?" he asked, slamming the trunk shut.
"Is it someone's birthday?" She marched over to him.
He nodded innocently and avoided her eyes. "Yeah, my grandmother. It's tomorrow."
"Wow," she said, rolling her eyes and walking in front of him. "Now, I look like a stingy bi.tch. Since you knew we were coming down here, you could at least have told me about it and given me the chance to get something." Yes, the lady was only her writer's grandmother but that didn't mean that she shouldn't be courteous, did it? She would probably have been able to write it off as a business expense. She glanced back at him and hissed in annoyance.
Shin giggled from behind her. "If it bothers you that much, I can add your name to the card."
She was about to respond with a cutting remark when she heard her phone ring. She excused herself and pulled out her phone and saw that it was her mother calling. Her heart skipped a beat as she stared at it for a few seconds while it rang, not sure of what to do next.
"Aren't you going to answer it?" He didn't even want to think of who it could be.
She took a deep breath in then flipped the phone open. Even though she knew she was going to get yelled at for not keeping their dinner date, she also realized it would be rude to not apologize to her mother. She'd avoided previous dinner dates because she was sure her mother was trying to fix her up with someone and had only been cornered into this one by her sister. And now that she'd unintentionally missed dinner, she was sure her mother wouldn't buy her excuse. Funny how the woman used to believe her lies but now, would probably not believe the truth. But what the heck? She was a grown woman and had to face the music somehow.
***
Shin's grandmother dropped the plate of roast chicken on the table and looked at the small spread of rice and vegetables next to it. "I wish you'd told me you were coming over this evening and especially that you were bringing a guest with you," she said for the umpteenth time. "If I'd known, I'd have prepared something better."
"Oh, I see," her husband said. "So you only cook good things when there are guests coming?"
She shrugged. "Isn't it obvious? Why bother going to great lengths for you when you'll eat anything?" she teased.
Ji Won smiled to herself. Moments like this always reminded her of the life she'd expected to lead with Joon Young and how she'd imagined they'd grow old together. Not that she could really picture him teasing her like that.
Shin father shook his head at his wife. "Instead of appreciating me, keep talking like that. Before you know it, you'll end up losing me to a beautiful young girl."
His wife scoffed and picked up his plate to serve him. "Not even in your dreams."
"You think I'm kidding?" he continued. "Beautiful young girls hit on me everyday. I'm still very attractive, you know?" He turned to Ji Won. "You think I'm attractive, don't you? Look at me properly," he said, lifting his chest and sitting up straight, "Don't you think I'm attractive? I'm probably your type, right?"
Suddenly brought into their bickering in a particularly odd way, Ji Won found herself speechless. She parted her lips but couldn't think of what would be the right thing to say. "Ehm…," she began.
Shin chuckled then touched her arm for support. "Just ignore him – he just loves to tease people and make them feel uncomfortable. I thought he was so weird when I first started living with him but he's just teasing. Ignore him."
Ji Won sank into her chair, relieved that she didn't have to respond.
"Yes, ignore him like I do," his wife said, placing his full plate in front of him. Then she pointed at the dishes. "Please dig in."
***
About 10 minutes into their dinner, Shin's grandfather put down his chopsticks and looked at his grandson. "So you thought I was weird?"
Shin chuckled and nodded. The moment those words had escaped his lips, he knew he'd have to explain himself at some point. "Of course I thought you were weird. What kind of man follows a little boy all around a food market? All you did was say hello to me then follow me around for about fifteen minutes. Who does that?"
"A weirdo," his grandmother supplied.
It was Shin's turn to put down his chopsticks. "And not only did you follow me that first time, you just happened to be at the market the next two times I was there, standing a few feet away staring at me. It was quite creepy and scary now that I think about it."
"I can imagine. But think about how I felt. Seeing you that first time was like being struck by lightning. Or maybe you can say, being hit by a meteorite and being transported to twenty-five years earlier. You were pretty much the spitting image of my son. There's no right way to react to that."
Shin flinched despite himself. Even though he felt he'd dealt with his abandonment issues, he still didn't like being compared to a man who'd done absolutely nothing for him in his life.
Ji Won noticed the slight change in his demeanor and finally understood why she'd been invited to share his private family moments with him. Maybe she was there to weed out topics he had yet to explore in his memoir… a topic like his father.
"But when you finally agreed to move here, I learned that you were nothing like Hee Chul," his grandfather mused.
Ji Won looked from grandfather to grandchild and recalled that part of the story. Apparently, unbeknownst to him, his grandfather had followed him one day and waited for Mr. Yoo to return from work. Unlike most normal people, instead of speaking with him that day, he'd stalked him for a few days before showing up at his workplace. As Shin wasn't present at any of these conversations, he was very shocked when about a month after meeting the old man, he learned he'd be living with him permanently. Shin had fought tooth and nail to not go home with the weird stranger but Mr. Yoo promised him that it would be for the best.
Shin grandmother reached over the table and touched Shin's cheek gently then smiled fondly at him. "At first I thought you were mute or just hadn't developed your language skills properly. You were so shy and didn't like to be around us. I think 'yes' and 'no' were the only words you spoke to me for about six months. And no matter how hard I tried to get to know you, you didn't open up."
"Halmoni, you're exaggerating," he said gruffly.
Ji Won turned to him and was shocked to see that he'd begun to blush furiously. So he knew how to be embarrassed? Yoon Pil Suh? What the heck?
"No, I'm serious. I was so worried and embarrassed and ashamed that someone I had given birth to was so heartless and had allowed his own flesh and blood to lead such a miserable life."
"It wasn't miserable," Shin defended. "It was different and probably wasn't ideal but I always felt loved. By my grandmother, by Aunt Oo Ra, by Uncle Bong Chol and even Mr. Yoo. And then, of course, by you guys," he said, waving his hand aimlessly. "So you see, it wasn't miserable." He picked up his glass of water and took a sip to wet his suddenly dry mouth. Even though it had been years, he still hated being pitied.
"No, it wasn't," his grandfather said with fake cheer. "It made you who you are today. A great man."
Shin laughed. "Hey, you don't have to take it too far."
His grandmother averted her eyes and fought to fight back tears. "No, it wasn't a miserable life," she said through a choked voice. Then she reached out and touched Shin's arm. "No, it wasn't miserable at all." It was something she'd been trying to reassure herself for over ten years and something she'd yet to fully believe.
Ji Won stared at her plate as the dinning room fell into uncomfortable silence. She put some rice in her mouth as she let the reality of what was being said sink in. She'd been far removed from his life story because she'd simply been treating it as words on paper. Paragraphs in a chapter. As pages in a book. She'd solely been viewing the story from an editor's point of view but now that it had been both humanized and validated, now that she suddenly realized that everything he'd written had really happened to him, her heart suddenly felt heavy with sadness and regret. And pity about the happy childhood he'd never gotten to experience. She glanced at him then looked back at her plate. Poor thing, she thought.
"Harbuji, remember how you used to drop mathematical equations in front of me and order me to solve them?"
His grandfather laughed. "You constantly had your nose in your notebook writing and writing so I wondered if you'd inherited my genes and were a genius and since we didn't think you were quite ready for school, that was my way of investigating it."
"And the result was…?" his wife asked, smiling and leading him to the punchline.
"And the result was that you weren't a genius at all! At your age, you should have at least been able to do long division!"
Shin pouted. "Hey, it's not my fault that I'd never been to school!"
They all laughed. "An excuse that would have been valid if you'd understood it after attending school," his grandmother joked.
"Whatever, men. Why do I need to learn long division when I can just use a calculator?"
Ji Won sat quietly, smiling and laughing as she watched the friendly family banter. Seeing Shin as a fully rounded person, not simply as this writer who'd lied to her and gotten on her nerves, she suddenly found herself developing some kind of respect for him. For the man who'd managed to create a full, productive life out of a history that could have made him a bitter, unhappy adult wielding an axe to grind against the world. And as she watched him laugh and tease his grandmother, she inexplicably felt proud of him. No, that wasn't it. She wasn't proud of him but instead, proud to know him. Or was she just finally happy to have had the opportunity to work with him? She couldn't quite put her finger on it but she definitely felt glad to be there. With them.
19 part 2
Chapter 19.2
Ji Won looked out of the rain beaten window before stepping out of the guest bedroom. When Shin's grandmother had suggested that they spend the night instead of driving back in the rain, she'd feebly protested. She still didn't know what it was but something about that house made her feel at ease and she didn't mind spending a bit more time over there. Besides, what was waiting for her at home, anyway?
Well, not that much at ease as she'd been sitting in the bedroom and staring at the wall for thirty minutes because she didn't want to join Shin's family in the living room. She couldn't quite put her finger on it but something about the way Shin's grandmother looked at her had begun to get to her. His grandma had this knowing look older women had when they were in on a secret and it had begun to creep her out. There was nothing more rattling than having a supposedly subliminal conversation with someone without having a clue what the other person was talking about.
Stuck in that room, Ji Won tried reading some of the magazines that had been put there but they were all at least a year old. It was clear they rarely had guests. Then she'd tried to fall asleep but for some reason, it had eluded her. She'd even thought of looking for Shin but what would they talk about? Sick of being bored, she got off the bed and decided to get herself a glass of water.
***
"Hey," Shin called as he saw Ji Won walk past the library. She'd disappeared after dinner and he'd been debating going up and talking to her. On one hand, he wanted to be a hospitable host and make sure she felt comfortable and enjoyed herself, but on the other hand, he didn't know if she'd prefer to have her privacy. After all, he'd tricked her into coming on the trip with him.
"Hey," Ji Won said, retracing her steps and popping her head into the room. "What are you doing here?"
He looked down at the box on the floor. "I figured that since I'm here, I might as well pack up some of my books."
"Yeah?" she said, walking into the room. It was a pretty small room filled with shelves stocked with books and two chairs. Because it was so cramped, from afar, one would expect the room to feel dusty and moldly but it really wasn't the bad. She bent over Shin's box and picked up a well-worn book from the top of the pile then looked it over. What the heck? She hid a smile and said, "I can't believe you have The Lone Tree!" She waved the book at him. "This book is what inspired me to get into publishing."
"Really?" Shin asked, perking up. The Lone Tree was one of his favorite books and even though he never mentioned it, had been a huge influence on his chosen career. Did it make any sense that he was pleased that they both loved the same book?
"Yes," she said, nodding. "The book is full of mistakes. Awful, awful, awful! I think there was an average of five mistakes a page. It's completely ridiculous!"
"What�?"
Ji Won paused to compose herself so as not to burst into laughter. The look of horror on Shin's face was beyond comedic. "This book is a disgrace to the literary world and should be given to every writer as a 'How Not To' guide. That's why you have it, right?"
Shin was still trying to digest what she was saying when she plopped into a chair and burst out laughing. "Oh my God, Shin, you should totally see your face right now," she said, laughing and pointing at him. "You looked like I'd just thrown up on your favorite toy! Ha ha ha, God I wish I had my phone on me," she said, hitting the sides of Shin's grandma's nightgown like she was feeling for it in the invisible pockets. "I want to take a photo. I WANT TO TAKE A PHOTO! I bet you thought you were the only person that could make stuff up, huh?" she said before another loud round of laughing. She'd even begun clapping at this point.
Shin shook his head and chuckled. It was the first time he'd really seen her figuratively let her hair down and relax, otherwise, he'd have wanted to throttle her for the stunt she'd just pulled. He'd never seen her look so cute.
"You should laugh more," he said, before he could stop himself.
"Yeah?" Ji Won said, suddenly sitting up straight and feeling awkward. It was amazing that that was all it took to get her back to her senses. She ironed out invisible creases in the nightgown and looked away from him.
Regretting his role in the sudden shift in atmosphere, Shin tried to do some damage control. "So what do you really think of The Lone Tree?"
She shrugged. "Nothing� considering I've never heard of it."
"Makes sense, considering it was a huge failure. I think it only sold about five hundred copies."
"But you love it anyway, right?"
He nodded. "I honestly can't remember where I first read it but it was one of those books that never left me so when I tried to find another copy, I learned that it was out of print. So I contacted the publisher who told me the books had been remaindered and that the author had bought them all. Then I contacted the author and he sold two copies to me for 1500 Won. It was the best 3000 Won I ever spent."
"Cool," Ji Won said, having nothing else to say. When writers got passionate about their work or other books, it was best to just let them ramble on till they tired out.
"Yes, it's one of those books that�," he continued. About two minutes later, when he finally realized that he was basically talking to himself, he picked up another book and held it out to her. "Here's another classic that nobody's read."
She took it from him, looked at the cover and smiled when she read the author's name. Since it wasn't part of his series, she figured that it must have been his very first book. "The Demon Pirate by Yoon Pil Suh," she said before looking up at him and laughing. "The Demon Pirate? I guess we don't need to look further than the title to figure out why nobody bought it."
"What?" Shin said before throwing another copy of his first book at her.
***
"Well, this is it," Ji Won said as Shin stopped the car in front of her building. She reached for the car door. "I still don't get how it would help with your writer's block but I hope it has."
Well, it obviously hadn't since he wasn't really experiencing any writer's block. Shin scratched his head and watched her step out of the car. What was the best way to 'fess up to his act? When he saw her opening the door to the backseat, he quickly turned around and put his hand on the case of wine she'd been gunning for. "Don't worry about it � I'll carry it for you," he said, looking at her through the window.
She protested but eventually let him carry it. They'd stopped at the store on their way back to her place and when she'd seen the wine on sale for half off, she couldn't resist buying it.
On the silent walk towards her building, Ji Won debated asking him in for a drink. Was it the right or wrong thing to do? They'd already spent so much time together so there wasn't any reason to spend any more but wasn't it polite to invite him in to share some of the wine since he'd so graciously carried it for her? As they approached the elevators, she decided to be polite and ask him.
Shin for his part, had also been trying to figure out the best time to come clean about the writer's block that her question had come as a shock to him. "Huh?" was all he could come up with.
Ji Won hit the 'Up' button. "Would you like to come in for a glass of wine?" she repeated.
A glass of...? A thought suddenly popped into his head. "But I don't have any condoms with me." He did his best to maintain a stern face.
"WHA-A-A-T?"
He looked away and tried to maintain his composure. It was payback time for her making fun of The Demon Pirate. He glanced at his watch. "Even though it's only noon and some people are at church right now, you obviously want to have sex. Am I right?"
No, you're crazy! The elevator came but she ignored it. She couldn't believe her ears. "Why in the world would you say that?"
"It's your M.O. Think back to Aruba. Every time you wanted to have sex, you invited me for a glass of wine."
Okay, so he was indeed crazy. "You know what?" Ji Won said, not even bothering to think back and confirm his allegations, "you're obviously insane." She grabbed the case of wine from his hands and elbowed him in his arm. Who did he think he was?
"Oh, one more thing," Shin said as she hit the 'up' button and the elevator doors parted. He nursed his sore arm and tried his best not to laugh.
"What?" she grunted, stepping into the elevator.
He pulled out a large yellow envelope from his bag and dropped it on the case in her hands. "That's the rest of my book."
She looked up at him in disbelief. "The rest...? You've finished it?"
"Yep," he said, nodding.
Then what was the bullsh.it about writer's block? But before Ji Won could vocalize her thoughts, the elevator doors shut.
***
Ji Won could not believe this guy. What the hell was his deal? He'd taken her on a trip for his deranged pleasure then had accused her of trying to seduce him. What the hell? And now, without any warning, just when she thought she'd have a quiet evening, she had a mountain of pages to edit. She grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge, sat down on her couch then pulled out the manuscript from the envelope. There was a sticky note on the first page.
I'm glad we're working together again. Would it be wrong to say that I missed working with you? If so, please forgive me but I can't help but say that I really did miss working with you. I'm looking forward to our next meeting.
-- Shin
Ji Won looked out of the rain beaten window before stepping out of the guest bedroom. When Shin's grandmother had suggested that they spend the night instead of driving back in the rain, she'd feebly protested. She still didn't know what it was but something about that house made her feel at ease and she didn't mind spending a bit more time over there. Besides, what was waiting for her at home, anyway?
Well, not that much at ease as she'd been sitting in the bedroom and staring at the wall for thirty minutes because she didn't want to join Shin's family in the living room. She couldn't quite put her finger on it but something about the way Shin's grandmother looked at her had begun to get to her. His grandma had this knowing look older women had when they were in on a secret and it had begun to creep her out. There was nothing more rattling than having a supposedly subliminal conversation with someone without having a clue what the other person was talking about.
Stuck in that room, Ji Won tried reading some of the magazines that had been put there but they were all at least a year old. It was clear they rarely had guests. Then she'd tried to fall asleep but for some reason, it had eluded her. She'd even thought of looking for Shin but what would they talk about? Sick of being bored, she got off the bed and decided to get herself a glass of water.
***
"Hey," Shin called as he saw Ji Won walk past the library. She'd disappeared after dinner and he'd been debating going up and talking to her. On one hand, he wanted to be a hospitable host and make sure she felt comfortable and enjoyed herself, but on the other hand, he didn't know if she'd prefer to have her privacy. After all, he'd tricked her into coming on the trip with him.
"Hey," Ji Won said, retracing her steps and popping her head into the room. "What are you doing here?"
He looked down at the box on the floor. "I figured that since I'm here, I might as well pack up some of my books."
"Yeah?" she said, walking into the room. It was a pretty small room filled with shelves stocked with books and two chairs. Because it was so cramped, from afar, one would expect the room to feel dusty and moldly but it really wasn't the bad. She bent over Shin's box and picked up a well-worn book from the top of the pile then looked it over. What the heck? She hid a smile and said, "I can't believe you have The Lone Tree!" She waved the book at him. "This book is what inspired me to get into publishing."
"Really?" Shin asked, perking up. The Lone Tree was one of his favorite books and even though he never mentioned it, had been a huge influence on his chosen career. Did it make any sense that he was pleased that they both loved the same book?
"Yes," she said, nodding. "The book is full of mistakes. Awful, awful, awful! I think there was an average of five mistakes a page. It's completely ridiculous!"
"What�?"
Ji Won paused to compose herself so as not to burst into laughter. The look of horror on Shin's face was beyond comedic. "This book is a disgrace to the literary world and should be given to every writer as a 'How Not To' guide. That's why you have it, right?"
Shin was still trying to digest what she was saying when she plopped into a chair and burst out laughing. "Oh my God, Shin, you should totally see your face right now," she said, laughing and pointing at him. "You looked like I'd just thrown up on your favorite toy! Ha ha ha, God I wish I had my phone on me," she said, hitting the sides of Shin's grandma's nightgown like she was feeling for it in the invisible pockets. "I want to take a photo. I WANT TO TAKE A PHOTO! I bet you thought you were the only person that could make stuff up, huh?" she said before another loud round of laughing. She'd even begun clapping at this point.
Shin shook his head and chuckled. It was the first time he'd really seen her figuratively let her hair down and relax, otherwise, he'd have wanted to throttle her for the stunt she'd just pulled. He'd never seen her look so cute.
"You should laugh more," he said, before he could stop himself.
"Yeah?" Ji Won said, suddenly sitting up straight and feeling awkward. It was amazing that that was all it took to get her back to her senses. She ironed out invisible creases in the nightgown and looked away from him.
Regretting his role in the sudden shift in atmosphere, Shin tried to do some damage control. "So what do you really think of The Lone Tree?"
She shrugged. "Nothing� considering I've never heard of it."
"Makes sense, considering it was a huge failure. I think it only sold about five hundred copies."
"But you love it anyway, right?"
He nodded. "I honestly can't remember where I first read it but it was one of those books that never left me so when I tried to find another copy, I learned that it was out of print. So I contacted the publisher who told me the books had been remaindered and that the author had bought them all. Then I contacted the author and he sold two copies to me for 1500 Won. It was the best 3000 Won I ever spent."
"Cool," Ji Won said, having nothing else to say. When writers got passionate about their work or other books, it was best to just let them ramble on till they tired out.
"Yes, it's one of those books that�," he continued. About two minutes later, when he finally realized that he was basically talking to himself, he picked up another book and held it out to her. "Here's another classic that nobody's read."
She took it from him, looked at the cover and smiled when she read the author's name. Since it wasn't part of his series, she figured that it must have been his very first book. "The Demon Pirate by Yoon Pil Suh," she said before looking up at him and laughing. "The Demon Pirate? I guess we don't need to look further than the title to figure out why nobody bought it."
"What?" Shin said before throwing another copy of his first book at her.
***
"Well, this is it," Ji Won said as Shin stopped the car in front of her building. She reached for the car door. "I still don't get how it would help with your writer's block but I hope it has."
Well, it obviously hadn't since he wasn't really experiencing any writer's block. Shin scratched his head and watched her step out of the car. What was the best way to 'fess up to his act? When he saw her opening the door to the backseat, he quickly turned around and put his hand on the case of wine she'd been gunning for. "Don't worry about it � I'll carry it for you," he said, looking at her through the window.
She protested but eventually let him carry it. They'd stopped at the store on their way back to her place and when she'd seen the wine on sale for half off, she couldn't resist buying it.
On the silent walk towards her building, Ji Won debated asking him in for a drink. Was it the right or wrong thing to do? They'd already spent so much time together so there wasn't any reason to spend any more but wasn't it polite to invite him in to share some of the wine since he'd so graciously carried it for her? As they approached the elevators, she decided to be polite and ask him.
Shin for his part, had also been trying to figure out the best time to come clean about the writer's block that her question had come as a shock to him. "Huh?" was all he could come up with.
Ji Won hit the 'Up' button. "Would you like to come in for a glass of wine?" she repeated.
A glass of...? A thought suddenly popped into his head. "But I don't have any condoms with me." He did his best to maintain a stern face.
"WHA-A-A-T?"
He looked away and tried to maintain his composure. It was payback time for her making fun of The Demon Pirate. He glanced at his watch. "Even though it's only noon and some people are at church right now, you obviously want to have sex. Am I right?"
No, you're crazy! The elevator came but she ignored it. She couldn't believe her ears. "Why in the world would you say that?"
"It's your M.O. Think back to Aruba. Every time you wanted to have sex, you invited me for a glass of wine."
Okay, so he was indeed crazy. "You know what?" Ji Won said, not even bothering to think back and confirm his allegations, "you're obviously insane." She grabbed the case of wine from his hands and elbowed him in his arm. Who did he think he was?
"Oh, one more thing," Shin said as she hit the 'up' button and the elevator doors parted. He nursed his sore arm and tried his best not to laugh.
"What?" she grunted, stepping into the elevator.
He pulled out a large yellow envelope from his bag and dropped it on the case in her hands. "That's the rest of my book."
She looked up at him in disbelief. "The rest...? You've finished it?"
"Yep," he said, nodding.
Then what was the bullsh.it about writer's block? But before Ji Won could vocalize her thoughts, the elevator doors shut.
***
Ji Won could not believe this guy. What the hell was his deal? He'd taken her on a trip for his deranged pleasure then had accused her of trying to seduce him. What the hell? And now, without any warning, just when she thought she'd have a quiet evening, she had a mountain of pages to edit. She grabbed a bottle of water from the fridge, sat down on her couch then pulled out the manuscript from the envelope. There was a sticky note on the first page.
I'm glad we're working together again. Would it be wrong to say that I missed working with you? If so, please forgive me but I can't help but say that I really did miss working with you. I'm looking forward to our next meeting.
-- Shin
20
Chapter 20
In the years after I moved in with my grandparents, I thought about my mother from time to time. As a child, I hadn’t really felt her absence much, as I’d found normalcy in my situation. Since I didn’t attend school or interact much with other children my age, I never really knew a lot about how other families were structured. Or what a traditional family was supposed to be.
But moving in with my grandparents, attending school and watching television opened my eyes to what the world viewed as ‘normal.’ It’s funny how a somewhat happy and fulfilled person can begin to miss things they never even had. Now looking back, I sometimes feel bad that even though my grandparents were trying their hardest to make me happy, I still longed for the type of family I could never have.
My biological father lived abroad and made it clear that he didn’t want anything to do with me. And as he was estranged from his parents, even though I lived with them, I rarely saw or heard from him. When I first moved in with my grandparents, I’d sneak around and look at old photos of him, trying to figure out what biological traits I’d inherited from him. And whenever I thought we had a similar nose or mouth, I was first elated, then stung by the obvious rejection. I did end up meeting him twice in my life and both times, he treated me like a stranger. But both times, I was surprised that I wasn’t as hurt as one would expect. Perhaps, somewhere in my heart, I always knew I’d never have a relationship with him.
Nonetheless, there were days I’d lie on my bed and daydream of a family composed of just three of us, living and loving together. However, that image was no where in my mind the day I saw my mother.
It had been years since I’d seen her and on that day, was on a date with my girlfriend, taking a stroll under the evening sun. We were holding hands, laughing and talking as we argued about what to have for dinner when I spotted her walking towards me from the other end of the sidewalk.
I’d also thought that I’d long forgotten what she looked like, and in fact, had failed many times to recall her face. But that day, there was no mistaking that the pleasantly plump woman walking hand in hand with what appeared to be an eight or nine year old boy was the woman who’d given me up.
Her face had softened with age but those lips and eyes were unmistakable and so like my grandma’s. Not to speak of nose that was just like mine. Even though her hair was a lot shorter, she still had that walk – that walk I saw whenever she'd turned around to leave me. It was definitely her - somehow the same and yet different. And the difference wasn't entirely from the looser skin and unexpected fullness of her face. No. As she walked and spoke to the boy, her eyes relayed an emotion I’d never seen there before.
It was a look I'd seen on my grandparent’s faces, one I’d seen on my grandmother’s face. Heck, I’d even seen it on my girlfriend’s face. But on my mother’s? Never. Not till the day I saw her looking at her little son.
Over the years, I’d found solace in believing that my mother just wasn’t a loving person. She could leave me because she wasn’t sentimental like that. She could get married and have another family without me because it just made more sense that way - it was the most practical thing. “She just wasn’t the type to love,” I’d made myself believe for several years. But as I watched her speak lovingly to that child, I knew I'd been wrong.
I watched her in dismay as I wondered why should couldn't love me.
I hadn’t realized that I’d stopped walking and was openly staring at her till my girlfriend tugged my arm and asked me if I was okay. I came back to my senses, looked at her and reassured her that I was.
When I resumed walking, I noticed my heart beating faster and faster as my mother and I got closer. "Why don't you love me too?" I wanted to scream but I couldn't because craving her love was something I'd never even admitted to myself, talk less of others. Besides, the emotions I was feeling on that day were far too overwhelming for me to work through so quickly.
I tried my best to act normal, laughing and pretending to listen to whatever my girlfriend was talking about but the whole time, all I could see was this stranger I suddenly hated, the one who'd abandoned me, walking towards us.
As we inched closer and closer, I began to wonder if she’d recognize me, and if she did what she’d say. Would she hug me and tell me she’d missed me? Would she ask me if I was doing alright? Would she ignore me and pretend not to know me? As we kept walking, I silently prayed that whatever it was, I'd be able to handle it.
As I kept walking, thinking of a hundred and one different scenarios she would speak to me, she walked by us without a visible flinch.
That was the last time I saw my mother.
***
“I’m just confirming that you’re coming over for dinner on Friday,” Ji Won’s mother said from the other end of the line.
“Umma, I already told you that I can’t make it,” Ji Won said as she pulled out the large envelope from her bag and put it on the table.
“Why not? I haven’t seen you in a while.”
“Umma, I don’t want you to fix me up with anyone.”
“Who said I’m fixing you up with anyone? It’s been a while since I’ve seen you and I just miss you.”
Yeah, right. They both knew there was more to it than that. “So is it just going to be me, you and Eun Hee?
Instead of a response, all she got from the phone was dead air, confirming what she knew.
“See what I mean?” Other than the fact that her mother kept mentioning supposedly successful sons of her random friends during their conversations, her sister had already told her that her mother had gone into high gear, trying to play matchmaker to her and her would-be son-in-law.
Ji Won quickly sat up straight when she saw Shin walking into the restaurant. He spoke to the hostess then looked around the room. It was show time. “Umma, I have a meeting so I have to hang up now.”
“Alright. See you on Friday.”
She sighed. “I won’t be there. Bye.”
Adrenaline pumping, Ji Won took a deep breath in and watched the hostess lead Shin to her table. What she was about to do had been a long time coming and she was already excited about what her life would be like once it was over with.
Shin smiled widely as he walked over and pulled out his chair. “I see you’re early.”
“Yeah,” she said before looking away. Okay, so the dumbass had a great smile but that didn’t mean he had the right to be all weird, odd and confusing. Not to speak of being a conman who made the most inappropriate and annoying jokes. And to think that she’d fallen for him at some point. But then again, she fell for the alter ego and not the real man. The guy she wrote to was cute, sweet and smart. She didn't even want to describe that guy who was smiling back at her. She sighed. Yes, it was time to let go.
“I was quite surprised by your call,” he said, sitting across from her.
She shrugged.
“You must have sped through the most recent draft – it’s not even a week yet, is it?” He gestured for the waitress to come over and take their orders.
She smiled as professionally as she could as she handed him the envelope. “The earlier, the better, right?”
He nodded, looking unsure of the situation. “Right.”
She inhaled then dove into the reason she’d made the call. “I think it’s in pretty good shape so all that’s left are the final edits.”
“Great,” Shin said, picking up the envelope and peeking into it. “It’ll take a few days to read through. But I must say, reading about my own life over and over is beginning to get rather tedious,” he joked. “How about we meet next Wednesday to begin the final phase?”
The waitress came over to get their orders but Ji Won informed her that she wouldn’t be staying long.
“Oh, you’re leaving soon?” he asked, placing the envelope in his bag. “Stay for dinner.” Now that the professional portion of the evening was over, there were some things he wanted to say.
“No,” she said firmly. “Well,” she said, sitting up straight, “I guess this is good bye.”
“Alright," he said, not hiding his disappointment, "I guess you’re busy. But is Wednesday okay?”
She shook her head. “I won’t be doing the final edits.”
“What? I thought it was already settled that you’re my one and only editor.” And other than that, he still had so many things to say to her. Like how he was so very sorry for what he’d said the last time they met. The stupid joke hadn’t gone down the way he had intended, and in the past week, as he recalled that night, he was baffled that at some point, he had thought there was a positive way it could go down. He’d been kicking himself for a week and needed her to not to be upset with him..
He ran his fingers through his hair and turned his face away to hide his embarrassment. “If this is about—”
“It’s best Ms. Kim does the final edits,” Ji Won interrupted. “It’ll be much better for your book and I’m sure most people would agree as she’s more experienced than I am.” She stood up then stretched out her hand. “It’s been nice working with you,” she said firmly.
Seeing the determination in her eyes, Shin knew that she wasn’t going to change her mind. This time, he’d really screwed up and she wasn’t going to give him another chance. Standing up, he reluctantly took her hand. Was this the end? “Likewise," was all he could say.
***
As Ji Won walked away, she slowly felt the weight lifting off her shoulders. She was done with him. DONE. As she remembered everything that had happened between them, from Aruba to that very moment, she concluded that her ex, Joon Young, was all to blame. If his selfish ass hadn’t left her at the altar, would she have been in that predicament? If she wasn’t so insecure about her ability to find a man who loved her, would she have fallen for an imaginary man she thought was in rehab of all places? Writing all those stupid notes at the end of each chapter and reading his over and over again like a love sick middle schooler. Imagining living in a field full of cup cakes, skipping around and singing love songs with him by her side. She’d truly lost her mind and was going to kick Joon Young’s ass the next time she saw him. But all in all, she was glad that that chapter of her life was finally over. And even though he’d been a big part of her life for a few months, it would be easy to move on. Right?
In the years after I moved in with my grandparents, I thought about my mother from time to time. As a child, I hadn’t really felt her absence much, as I’d found normalcy in my situation. Since I didn’t attend school or interact much with other children my age, I never really knew a lot about how other families were structured. Or what a traditional family was supposed to be.
But moving in with my grandparents, attending school and watching television opened my eyes to what the world viewed as ‘normal.’ It’s funny how a somewhat happy and fulfilled person can begin to miss things they never even had. Now looking back, I sometimes feel bad that even though my grandparents were trying their hardest to make me happy, I still longed for the type of family I could never have.
My biological father lived abroad and made it clear that he didn’t want anything to do with me. And as he was estranged from his parents, even though I lived with them, I rarely saw or heard from him. When I first moved in with my grandparents, I’d sneak around and look at old photos of him, trying to figure out what biological traits I’d inherited from him. And whenever I thought we had a similar nose or mouth, I was first elated, then stung by the obvious rejection. I did end up meeting him twice in my life and both times, he treated me like a stranger. But both times, I was surprised that I wasn’t as hurt as one would expect. Perhaps, somewhere in my heart, I always knew I’d never have a relationship with him.
Nonetheless, there were days I’d lie on my bed and daydream of a family composed of just three of us, living and loving together. However, that image was no where in my mind the day I saw my mother.
It had been years since I’d seen her and on that day, was on a date with my girlfriend, taking a stroll under the evening sun. We were holding hands, laughing and talking as we argued about what to have for dinner when I spotted her walking towards me from the other end of the sidewalk.
I’d also thought that I’d long forgotten what she looked like, and in fact, had failed many times to recall her face. But that day, there was no mistaking that the pleasantly plump woman walking hand in hand with what appeared to be an eight or nine year old boy was the woman who’d given me up.
Her face had softened with age but those lips and eyes were unmistakable and so like my grandma’s. Not to speak of nose that was just like mine. Even though her hair was a lot shorter, she still had that walk – that walk I saw whenever she'd turned around to leave me. It was definitely her - somehow the same and yet different. And the difference wasn't entirely from the looser skin and unexpected fullness of her face. No. As she walked and spoke to the boy, her eyes relayed an emotion I’d never seen there before.
It was a look I'd seen on my grandparent’s faces, one I’d seen on my grandmother’s face. Heck, I’d even seen it on my girlfriend’s face. But on my mother’s? Never. Not till the day I saw her looking at her little son.
Over the years, I’d found solace in believing that my mother just wasn’t a loving person. She could leave me because she wasn’t sentimental like that. She could get married and have another family without me because it just made more sense that way - it was the most practical thing. “She just wasn’t the type to love,” I’d made myself believe for several years. But as I watched her speak lovingly to that child, I knew I'd been wrong.
I watched her in dismay as I wondered why should couldn't love me.
I hadn’t realized that I’d stopped walking and was openly staring at her till my girlfriend tugged my arm and asked me if I was okay. I came back to my senses, looked at her and reassured her that I was.
When I resumed walking, I noticed my heart beating faster and faster as my mother and I got closer. "Why don't you love me too?" I wanted to scream but I couldn't because craving her love was something I'd never even admitted to myself, talk less of others. Besides, the emotions I was feeling on that day were far too overwhelming for me to work through so quickly.
I tried my best to act normal, laughing and pretending to listen to whatever my girlfriend was talking about but the whole time, all I could see was this stranger I suddenly hated, the one who'd abandoned me, walking towards us.
As we inched closer and closer, I began to wonder if she’d recognize me, and if she did what she’d say. Would she hug me and tell me she’d missed me? Would she ask me if I was doing alright? Would she ignore me and pretend not to know me? As we kept walking, I silently prayed that whatever it was, I'd be able to handle it.
As I kept walking, thinking of a hundred and one different scenarios she would speak to me, she walked by us without a visible flinch.
That was the last time I saw my mother.
***
“I’m just confirming that you’re coming over for dinner on Friday,” Ji Won’s mother said from the other end of the line.
“Umma, I already told you that I can’t make it,” Ji Won said as she pulled out the large envelope from her bag and put it on the table.
“Why not? I haven’t seen you in a while.”
“Umma, I don’t want you to fix me up with anyone.”
“Who said I’m fixing you up with anyone? It’s been a while since I’ve seen you and I just miss you.”
Yeah, right. They both knew there was more to it than that. “So is it just going to be me, you and Eun Hee?
Instead of a response, all she got from the phone was dead air, confirming what she knew.
“See what I mean?” Other than the fact that her mother kept mentioning supposedly successful sons of her random friends during their conversations, her sister had already told her that her mother had gone into high gear, trying to play matchmaker to her and her would-be son-in-law.
Ji Won quickly sat up straight when she saw Shin walking into the restaurant. He spoke to the hostess then looked around the room. It was show time. “Umma, I have a meeting so I have to hang up now.”
“Alright. See you on Friday.”
She sighed. “I won’t be there. Bye.”
Adrenaline pumping, Ji Won took a deep breath in and watched the hostess lead Shin to her table. What she was about to do had been a long time coming and she was already excited about what her life would be like once it was over with.
Shin smiled widely as he walked over and pulled out his chair. “I see you’re early.”
“Yeah,” she said before looking away. Okay, so the dumbass had a great smile but that didn’t mean he had the right to be all weird, odd and confusing. Not to speak of being a conman who made the most inappropriate and annoying jokes. And to think that she’d fallen for him at some point. But then again, she fell for the alter ego and not the real man. The guy she wrote to was cute, sweet and smart. She didn't even want to describe that guy who was smiling back at her. She sighed. Yes, it was time to let go.
“I was quite surprised by your call,” he said, sitting across from her.
She shrugged.
“You must have sped through the most recent draft – it’s not even a week yet, is it?” He gestured for the waitress to come over and take their orders.
She smiled as professionally as she could as she handed him the envelope. “The earlier, the better, right?”
He nodded, looking unsure of the situation. “Right.”
She inhaled then dove into the reason she’d made the call. “I think it’s in pretty good shape so all that’s left are the final edits.”
“Great,” Shin said, picking up the envelope and peeking into it. “It’ll take a few days to read through. But I must say, reading about my own life over and over is beginning to get rather tedious,” he joked. “How about we meet next Wednesday to begin the final phase?”
The waitress came over to get their orders but Ji Won informed her that she wouldn’t be staying long.
“Oh, you’re leaving soon?” he asked, placing the envelope in his bag. “Stay for dinner.” Now that the professional portion of the evening was over, there were some things he wanted to say.
“No,” she said firmly. “Well,” she said, sitting up straight, “I guess this is good bye.”
“Alright," he said, not hiding his disappointment, "I guess you’re busy. But is Wednesday okay?”
She shook her head. “I won’t be doing the final edits.”
“What? I thought it was already settled that you’re my one and only editor.” And other than that, he still had so many things to say to her. Like how he was so very sorry for what he’d said the last time they met. The stupid joke hadn’t gone down the way he had intended, and in the past week, as he recalled that night, he was baffled that at some point, he had thought there was a positive way it could go down. He’d been kicking himself for a week and needed her to not to be upset with him..
He ran his fingers through his hair and turned his face away to hide his embarrassment. “If this is about—”
“It’s best Ms. Kim does the final edits,” Ji Won interrupted. “It’ll be much better for your book and I’m sure most people would agree as she’s more experienced than I am.” She stood up then stretched out her hand. “It’s been nice working with you,” she said firmly.
Seeing the determination in her eyes, Shin knew that she wasn’t going to change her mind. This time, he’d really screwed up and she wasn’t going to give him another chance. Standing up, he reluctantly took her hand. Was this the end? “Likewise," was all he could say.
***
As Ji Won walked away, she slowly felt the weight lifting off her shoulders. She was done with him. DONE. As she remembered everything that had happened between them, from Aruba to that very moment, she concluded that her ex, Joon Young, was all to blame. If his selfish ass hadn’t left her at the altar, would she have been in that predicament? If she wasn’t so insecure about her ability to find a man who loved her, would she have fallen for an imaginary man she thought was in rehab of all places? Writing all those stupid notes at the end of each chapter and reading his over and over again like a love sick middle schooler. Imagining living in a field full of cup cakes, skipping around and singing love songs with him by her side. She’d truly lost her mind and was going to kick Joon Young’s ass the next time she saw him. But all in all, she was glad that that chapter of her life was finally over. And even though he’d been a big part of her life for a few months, it would be easy to move on. Right?
21
Chapter 21.
Holding her phone, Ji Won read the latest email sent by her current client. She was working on a popular blogger’s first relationship book. Most of the advice was common sense from an unconventional angle and she wondered if she’d have benefited from reading such a book many years earlier. Perhaps she would have known how to distinguish a bad relationship from a good one. Working on this book for the last week and a half had forced her to re-examine her relationships with men. Why was she bad at picking them? Was something wrong with her? Are there certain qualities that all bubble gums share? She’d wanted to seek some advice from her client but in all honesty, wasn’t sure he was that qualified. After all, he’d confessed that he hadn’t been in a long term relationship for over three years. So how in the hell was a single man, one who’d never been married, one who’d never been in a successful relationship, qualified as a relationship expert? It really didn’t make sense but his writing was creative and entertaining. Maybe that was all his fans cared about.
“Enjoy,” the Ajumma said, plopping the bowls of ramen in front of Ji Won and her friends.
“Thank you,” they said in unison.
Ji Won put her phone back in her bag and rejoined the conversation.
“So that’s the story of my life,” her friend, Na Mi said, picking up her chopsticks. “After searching for a job for 9 months, I finally find one. But here I am a week later, ready to throw in the towel. If someone had told me that I would be working with the devil himself, I would have declined their offer. ”
“As far as you understand that I’m no longer lending you any money, it’s all good with me,” their friend Kyung Ho said, shrugging.
“Shut the hell up. When did I ever ask you for money?”
Ji Won ate her ramen in amusement as she watched them fight. She glanced at another friend of theirs and they both rolled their eyes.
“So whenever we go out together and you don’t pay, what do you think I use to pay your share? Air?”
Na Mi scowled at him. “Did I ever ask you to do that?”
Their arguing was interrupted by a loud buzz from Ji Won’s phone.
“Ji Won ah, can you please make that a little louder?” Kyung Ho said sarcastically. “My left eardrum hasn’t burst yet.”
Ji Won ignored him and flipped open her phone. It was a text from Shin. Suddenly feeling uneasy, she wondered what he was contacting her for. Should she read it or not? Maybe she should just delete it without even reading it. Because surely, she’d made it clear that she wouldn’t be contacting him anymore. She dropped her phone back without reading the text. But a minute later, curiosity got the best of her and she read it.
Hi.
The hell? she thought to herself. It had been two weeks since she’d last seen him and he’d suddenly found the urge to hit her with a “Hi?” Why?
She closed her phone back then picked up her chopsticks. As she chewed on the suddenly tasteless ramen, wondering why in the world he felt he had the right to contact her, her phone buzzed again.
I said hi. Why didn’t you reply?
Okay, this guy was officially annoying. "Why didn’t she reply?" Couldn’t he figure that out on his own? And why was he so damn impatient? How could he even know that she’d seen the message anyway? As she was staring at the message, shaking her head in annoyance, another message came through.
Hi for the third time. And this time, instead of just staring at your phone, why don’t you use it and say hi back?
The hell? Instinctively, she turned her head and looked around the room. It didn’t take long for her to find him a few tables away, not looking at her and chatting away with a group of young men in suits. She sighed then quickly turned around and looked up at the ceiling. “Oh Lord, why are you doing this to me?” And why the hell didn’t she just go home for dinner?
**
Okay, so he knew he was being a bit childish but he couldn’t stop himself. Every single day for the past two weeks, he’d picked up his phone and found her number. And each time, he had to talk himself out of dialing it. Because she’d made it clear that she didn’t want to see him again and he knew that he should respect her wishes. But he just couldn’t get her out of his mind. Not that he’d tried that hard. The truth was, he kind of liked thinking about her. So everyday, he’d tried not to be an ass and not contacted her. But now that she was with a group of friends, eating and laughing like he was nothing but a distant memory, he inexplicably got annoyed and had to make contact.
He watched her look to the heavens and wondered if she was thanking God that he’d finally contacted her. He chuckled to himself because he knew that was definitely not the case.
He watched her put her phone back in her bag and just had to text her again.
I’m glad to see that you’re looking well.
“Yo, Shin, did you invite us to dinner just so that we could watch you text?”
He laughed and dropped his phone back on the table. “No. And who said I invited you? Is my name T.K?”
“Yes, yes, I was the one who sent out the invite,” the slightly built man sitting next to him said. “It’s not everyday I am in Seoul so I wanted to catch up with you guys. Is that okay with you?” Then he turned to Shin. “But Shin, tell me; who’s the girl you keep glancing at sitting over there?”
“What girl?” someone asked. All four men turned around to look in Ji Won’s direction.
“Please be more obvious,” he said dryly.
“Whatever you want, bro,” T.K. joked. “But who is she? And how did you screw this one up this time? I’m not sure she’s your usual type but she’s fine. Isn’t she?”
They all nodded and voiced their approval.
Ignoring them, Shin watched Ji Won read his text and frowned as she didn’t respond yet again. He picked up his phone again and typed.
I’m fine too. I’m just having dinner with some old friends.
He shook his head in disgust as he hit the send button. Oh gosh, he asked himself, why am I doing this? Am I five years old? She clearly doesn't want to talk to you so why can't you stop?
“So come on, tell us,” another friend said. “How did you screw it up?”
He looked up from his phone. “Who told you I screwed it up?”
“Hmm… let me see. Maybe the fact that you’re texting her instead of just going over there.”
“Or that you can’t keep your eyes off her.”
“Or that she hasn’t even replied to any of your texts. That should be a hint,” another said, before bursting into laughter.
They all laughed and even Shin couldn’t help but join them. It was a rather pathetic scene, wasn’t it?
“Just mind your business,” he said before taking a sip of his soju. As his friends kept yapping away, teasing him on his bad luck with women, he picked up his phone and typed out another text.
What are you doing these days? Editing is going okay but it’s not the same without you.
He re-read what he’d written then deleted the last two words. Wasn’t that being a bit too forward? Thinking it through again, he added them back. But why beat about the bush? I might as well go all the way, he rationalized to himself as he stretched out his finger to hit send. Or maybe not, he thought again before finally deciding to leave out those two words before sending the message. He didn’t want to annoy her any more than he already had.
Still pretending to listen to his friends, Shin watched as he waited for her to read his latest message. But when her phone buzzed, one of her friends grabbed it and tried to keep it away from her. Then Ji Won playfully struggled to retrieve it from him.
Okay, Shin thought to himself. Is it wrong that I don’t like seeing her so happy with another man? And what was he to her, anyway? He picked up his phone and sent another text.
I’m glad you’re reading my texts.
Shin hung his head in shame as he wondered what the hell he was doing. He looked up at the moment she turned around to look back at him. He was startled at first to be looking directly into her eyes, but when he tried to read them, he failed miserably. What was she thinking? And did she hate him even more now? She looked away, however, less than a minute later, Shin held his breath as he watched as she picked up her phone and began to type on it.
**
Holding her phone, Ji Won read the latest email sent by her current client. She was working on a popular blogger’s first relationship book. Most of the advice was common sense from an unconventional angle and she wondered if she’d have benefited from reading such a book many years earlier. Perhaps she would have known how to distinguish a bad relationship from a good one. Working on this book for the last week and a half had forced her to re-examine her relationships with men. Why was she bad at picking them? Was something wrong with her? Are there certain qualities that all bubble gums share? She’d wanted to seek some advice from her client but in all honesty, wasn’t sure he was that qualified. After all, he’d confessed that he hadn’t been in a long term relationship for over three years. So how in the hell was a single man, one who’d never been married, one who’d never been in a successful relationship, qualified as a relationship expert? It really didn’t make sense but his writing was creative and entertaining. Maybe that was all his fans cared about.
“Enjoy,” the Ajumma said, plopping the bowls of ramen in front of Ji Won and her friends.
“Thank you,” they said in unison.
Ji Won put her phone back in her bag and rejoined the conversation.
“So that’s the story of my life,” her friend, Na Mi said, picking up her chopsticks. “After searching for a job for 9 months, I finally find one. But here I am a week later, ready to throw in the towel. If someone had told me that I would be working with the devil himself, I would have declined their offer. ”
“As far as you understand that I’m no longer lending you any money, it’s all good with me,” their friend Kyung Ho said, shrugging.
“Shut the hell up. When did I ever ask you for money?”
Ji Won ate her ramen in amusement as she watched them fight. She glanced at another friend of theirs and they both rolled their eyes.
“So whenever we go out together and you don’t pay, what do you think I use to pay your share? Air?”
Na Mi scowled at him. “Did I ever ask you to do that?”
Their arguing was interrupted by a loud buzz from Ji Won’s phone.
“Ji Won ah, can you please make that a little louder?” Kyung Ho said sarcastically. “My left eardrum hasn’t burst yet.”
Ji Won ignored him and flipped open her phone. It was a text from Shin. Suddenly feeling uneasy, she wondered what he was contacting her for. Should she read it or not? Maybe she should just delete it without even reading it. Because surely, she’d made it clear that she wouldn’t be contacting him anymore. She dropped her phone back without reading the text. But a minute later, curiosity got the best of her and she read it.
Hi.
The hell? she thought to herself. It had been two weeks since she’d last seen him and he’d suddenly found the urge to hit her with a “Hi?” Why?
She closed her phone back then picked up her chopsticks. As she chewed on the suddenly tasteless ramen, wondering why in the world he felt he had the right to contact her, her phone buzzed again.
I said hi. Why didn’t you reply?
Okay, this guy was officially annoying. "Why didn’t she reply?" Couldn’t he figure that out on his own? And why was he so damn impatient? How could he even know that she’d seen the message anyway? As she was staring at the message, shaking her head in annoyance, another message came through.
Hi for the third time. And this time, instead of just staring at your phone, why don’t you use it and say hi back?
The hell? Instinctively, she turned her head and looked around the room. It didn’t take long for her to find him a few tables away, not looking at her and chatting away with a group of young men in suits. She sighed then quickly turned around and looked up at the ceiling. “Oh Lord, why are you doing this to me?” And why the hell didn’t she just go home for dinner?
**
Okay, so he knew he was being a bit childish but he couldn’t stop himself. Every single day for the past two weeks, he’d picked up his phone and found her number. And each time, he had to talk himself out of dialing it. Because she’d made it clear that she didn’t want to see him again and he knew that he should respect her wishes. But he just couldn’t get her out of his mind. Not that he’d tried that hard. The truth was, he kind of liked thinking about her. So everyday, he’d tried not to be an ass and not contacted her. But now that she was with a group of friends, eating and laughing like he was nothing but a distant memory, he inexplicably got annoyed and had to make contact.
He watched her look to the heavens and wondered if she was thanking God that he’d finally contacted her. He chuckled to himself because he knew that was definitely not the case.
He watched her put her phone back in her bag and just had to text her again.
I’m glad to see that you’re looking well.
“Yo, Shin, did you invite us to dinner just so that we could watch you text?”
He laughed and dropped his phone back on the table. “No. And who said I invited you? Is my name T.K?”
“Yes, yes, I was the one who sent out the invite,” the slightly built man sitting next to him said. “It’s not everyday I am in Seoul so I wanted to catch up with you guys. Is that okay with you?” Then he turned to Shin. “But Shin, tell me; who’s the girl you keep glancing at sitting over there?”
“What girl?” someone asked. All four men turned around to look in Ji Won’s direction.
“Please be more obvious,” he said dryly.
“Whatever you want, bro,” T.K. joked. “But who is she? And how did you screw this one up this time? I’m not sure she’s your usual type but she’s fine. Isn’t she?”
They all nodded and voiced their approval.
Ignoring them, Shin watched Ji Won read his text and frowned as she didn’t respond yet again. He picked up his phone again and typed.
I’m fine too. I’m just having dinner with some old friends.
He shook his head in disgust as he hit the send button. Oh gosh, he asked himself, why am I doing this? Am I five years old? She clearly doesn't want to talk to you so why can't you stop?
“So come on, tell us,” another friend said. “How did you screw it up?”
He looked up from his phone. “Who told you I screwed it up?”
“Hmm… let me see. Maybe the fact that you’re texting her instead of just going over there.”
“Or that you can’t keep your eyes off her.”
“Or that she hasn’t even replied to any of your texts. That should be a hint,” another said, before bursting into laughter.
They all laughed and even Shin couldn’t help but join them. It was a rather pathetic scene, wasn’t it?
“Just mind your business,” he said before taking a sip of his soju. As his friends kept yapping away, teasing him on his bad luck with women, he picked up his phone and typed out another text.
What are you doing these days? Editing is going okay but it’s not the same without you.
He re-read what he’d written then deleted the last two words. Wasn’t that being a bit too forward? Thinking it through again, he added them back. But why beat about the bush? I might as well go all the way, he rationalized to himself as he stretched out his finger to hit send. Or maybe not, he thought again before finally deciding to leave out those two words before sending the message. He didn’t want to annoy her any more than he already had.
Still pretending to listen to his friends, Shin watched as he waited for her to read his latest message. But when her phone buzzed, one of her friends grabbed it and tried to keep it away from her. Then Ji Won playfully struggled to retrieve it from him.
Okay, Shin thought to himself. Is it wrong that I don’t like seeing her so happy with another man? And what was he to her, anyway? He picked up his phone and sent another text.
I’m glad you’re reading my texts.
Shin hung his head in shame as he wondered what the hell he was doing. He looked up at the moment she turned around to look back at him. He was startled at first to be looking directly into her eyes, but when he tried to read them, he failed miserably. What was she thinking? And did she hate him even more now? She looked away, however, less than a minute later, Shin held his breath as he watched as she picked up her phone and began to type on it.
**
22
Chapter 22.
“Seriously, who’s texting you like crazy?” Hyung Ho asked.
Ji Won held her phone up to his face so that he could read the latest text.
I’ve sent you the next four chapters. We should probably meet as soon as possible. When and where would be best for you?
Kyung Ho read it then shook his head. “Oh, it’s your favorite Stalkewriter.”
“Surely, you’re allowed to have dinner or are you on call twenty four hours a day?” their other friend asked. “I don’t even know how you put up with it,”
“When you have to pay bills, you put up with everything.”
Kyung Ho crooked his head at their friend. “Did you hear that, Na Mi?”
“Go suck a lemon, Ho.”
Ji Won laughed at their exchange as usual and just as she was about to hit the reply button, another text came through.
I’m glad you’re reading my texts.
Stop texting me for chrissakes! Ji Won thought, frowning, as she quickly spun her head around and caught Shin’s eye. She wasn’t in the mood for his nonsense especially as right after dinner, she’d have to go back home and read several chapters about what women should do to keep a man. And the worst part was the writer was very much into routine so even though he acted like he was flexible, he only ever wanted to meet the day after turning his draft, at the same time at the same place.
She hit the reply button and typed:
We can meet tomorrow at 10am on the ground floor of the public library near my office.
Less than a minute later, a text came through.
Why don’t we meet tomorrow at 10am at the library near your office?
Ji Won rolled her eyes. Didn’t she just write that?
A minute after confirming her plans with the writer, another text from Shin came through.
O.K.
Okay to what? That he’d finally gotten the message and was no longer going to bother her? And twenty minutes later, when she and her friends were paying the bill, she was glad that her phone had been silent the whole time. Score? No more Shin?
***
We can meet tomorrow at 10am on the ground floor of the public library near my office.
Shin re-read that message a hundred times and couldn’t figure out why she’d sent it. All he’d really wanted was for her to text him back so that he could know that there were no heard feelings. But now she wanted to meet…?
Did she want to give him a stern warning and ask that he never contact her again? He wasn’t insane nor a stalker and he vowed that if she even as much as hinted that she’d wanted him to lose her number, he’d bow out gracefully. Not that it would be easy, but it would only be fair. And gentlemanly.
Staring at his reflection in the mirror, he wondered if he should make a quick stop at his favorite barber’s for a quick touch up then slapped his head in frustration.
“Get your act together! You’re a man, for goodness sake!” he yelled at his reflection.
Why he was fretting so much? She was only a woman. A wonderful, beautiful woman he had regrets about but still just a woman. So no big deal. He can just move on. Heck, he should have just moved on and never sent the first text. Why didn’t he just cut his losses? Why did he have to contact her? What did she want to say to him? Would she give him a chance to apologize? Would it make a difference? Was she going to threaten him with a restraining order? Glancing at the clock he kept in the cabinet, he wondered what was in store for him in exactly two hours.
About an hour later, as he was getting ready to leave his apartment, his phone rang.
“Gosh, she’s calling to cancel,” he said aloud, then slapped himself. “Be a damn man, you fool!” he said before clearing his throat to put on his baritone.
Pulling it out of his pocket, he glanced at the caller id then sighed.
“Harboji, good morning. Why are you calling so early? Is everything okay?”
“Yes, everything is fine. When next can you come over?”
“Huh? Harboji, didn’t I just come over to visit?” he glanced at his reflection one last time. He was looking as good as he ever could.
“Yes, but I want to talk to you.”
“About what?”
“I’ll tell you when you come by.”
He picked up his comb and ran it through his hair one last time then took another glance at his reflection. “Why can’t you tell me now? Am I not using the same ears to listen to you now?”
“Let’s talk in person.”
He sighed. Then froze for a second. Was something wrong? “Is Halmoni sick? Are you sick?”
“No. It’s nothing like that.”
He exhaled then picked up his lint brush for one last touch up. “Then what? I’m really busy, if you have something to say, just say it now.”
“We should do this in person, my son.”
Whatever. “Okay. I have to go now, Harboji.”
***
Ji Won found the usual table and plopped her laptop on it. She usually arrived about thirty minutes early to secure the table and mentally prepare for this particular client. Other than his sketchy qualifications as a relationship expert, Mr. Lee had a way of challenging every single thing she suggested. She was certain that if it wasn’t required that he work with an editor, he would have self edited – which would have been disastrous based on his drafts. He was funny but needed to be reminded that Spell Check wasn’t his enemy.
“I see you came in early as well,” he heard a voice say from behind her.
Recognizing it, she spun her head around in shock. What was he doing here?
“I must admit that I was surprised that you wanted to meet,” Shin said, walking over and standing in front of her.
She looked up at his smiling face, still confused. “Me?" she asked, point to herself. "I wanted to meet you?”
He nodded, registering the look on her face. “That’s what your text said." He reached for his phone, realizing that he’d need to show proof.
“I didn’t text you.”
He found it and showed it to her. “Then what is this?”
What was going on? She quickly pulled out her phone, searched her outbox and in a few seconds, found the incriminating evidence. She looked up at him in embarrassment.
Registering this look, he pulled out a chair and sat across from her. So clearly, there’d been a miscommunication but that didn’t mean he should turn around and leave. Why not make use of this opportunity? Especially with her looking so pretty. Did she dress up this much when they met?
Ji Won took a deep breath in and decided to go on the offensive. “You texted me so many times that I must have accidently hit the send button. I’m actually meeting with a client of mine in about…,” she paused to look at her watch, “… twenty minutes. I’m sorry about the misunderstanding. That text wasn’t meant for you.”
“I see.”
“I really am sorry, but…,” she said, looking at the door way, hoping that the hanging word would hint that he needed to leave. But since he didn’t budge and instead, kept staring at her with some weird look on his face, she had to be direct. “I need to prepare for my client so…”
“So, you’d like me to leave.”
She nodded. “That would make the most sense.” She looked away. He was clearly trying his best to disarm her with his smile but it wasn’t going to work.
“So you just want me to walk away after postponing another appointment to be here?”
She shrugged. What did he want from her? “I already apologized.”
“But how are you going to take responsibility for this?” he asked with a very serious look.
She frowned at him. “What?”
“I have an hour to kill and it’s all your fault,” he said. Sighing and making a big show of it.
“I don’t know what to say.”
“Say you’ll have dinner with me.”
Her mouth flung open then she chuckled. Was he for real? “This is not a movie so don’t even think about that.”
“Hey, it was worth a shot." He laughed. “Well,” he said, standing up, “I know how seriously you take your work so I shouldn’t take up any more of your time. But I might as well kill the time here. Maybe there’s a magazine I can read. Is that okay with you?”
“Suit yourself,” Ji Won said, grateful for the end of the conversation.
At 10 o’clock on the dot, her client walked in. She didn’t even need to turn around to know that Shin would be watching them from a few tables away but it didn’t matter. It was time to work, which meant her old client would be long forgotten.
***
That client of yours… He’s a bit of a jerk, isn’t he?
“You don’t say,” Ji Won whispered as she read the text. “Should I or should I not respond?” she asked herself. Well, what the heck. It was not like she had anything better to do as she waited for her order to arrive. Maybe if she replied once and for all, he’d back the hell off.
Well, he’s just like my last client.
Touché. Is his book interesting?
You can buy it in six months.
What’s it called?
Okay, wasn’t she being clear enough? Perhaps she needed to be more direct.
You’re bugging me.
It’s lunch time.
She laughed. How random.
So?
Let’s eat.
I’m already eating. Well, not technically. But she would be in a few minutes.
With him?
No.
You should have told me before you left for lunch so that we could have met up.
In his dreams.
I think you’re drunk.
lol. No I’m not. It’s not even 2pm yet. I’m just mad I missed that opportunity.
Which opportunity? You’re delusional.
You’re working with him the whole day?
How is it your business?
I can come and pick you up for dinner.
Ji Won laughed again. Was he for real?
I don’t want to eat with you.
My book is coming along well.
Good.
“Thank you,” she told the waitress before digging into her food.
But it’s not the same.
…
You’re responding to my texts.
You want me to stop?
Did your client stop being a jerk after I left?
What’s a jerk?
You just said someone like me.
No, he’s different – much nicer than you.
When did you become so mean?
It was from spending time with you.
“You” as in “you?”
Ji Won smiled. Oh, was he trying to be smart with her.
No. “You” as in “you”
lol. I knew you didn’t mean me but you.
Are you trying to be funny?
How can I try to be something I already am? So that new guy… he doesn’t know who’s boss – he keeps arguing with you. Do you want me to come over and tape his mouth shut?
She giggled.
Yes!
When should I came over?
After lunch.
Are you serious?
Of course. Bring really strong tape.
??
An impish smile covered Ji Won’s face.
Oh, you don’t get it? If you tape his mouth shut, you’ll get an assault charge. Which would land you in jail, and keep you from texting me.
She laughed at her little joke and waited for a reply but got nothing. About five minutes later, as she chewed the beef that for some reason no longer tasted as good, she wondered if she’d gone too far. But that was okay, right? The point was to get rid of him. But why did she feel bad? UGH! Why couldn’t she help the way she felt. She was supposed to feel good about this! But as she sat there waiting for his text, she reflected on everything that had happened and concluded that he wasn’t the devil, after all. So maybe he didn’t deserve to be treated that way. Maybe she should apologize.
I was only joking.
I really was only joking
With the way you joke, I didn’t think you’d be this sensitive.
It was only a little joke.
Shin smiled as he read the last series of texts. He hadn’t immediately replied to her last text because he’d received a call from his agent. But after reading those messages, he decided to let her squirm a little. He laughed to himself thinking that maybe, just maybe, it was a good thing to contact her after all.
“Seriously, who’s texting you like crazy?” Hyung Ho asked.
Ji Won held her phone up to his face so that he could read the latest text.
I’ve sent you the next four chapters. We should probably meet as soon as possible. When and where would be best for you?
Kyung Ho read it then shook his head. “Oh, it’s your favorite Stalkewriter.”
“Surely, you’re allowed to have dinner or are you on call twenty four hours a day?” their other friend asked. “I don’t even know how you put up with it,”
“When you have to pay bills, you put up with everything.”
Kyung Ho crooked his head at their friend. “Did you hear that, Na Mi?”
“Go suck a lemon, Ho.”
Ji Won laughed at their exchange as usual and just as she was about to hit the reply button, another text came through.
I’m glad you’re reading my texts.
Stop texting me for chrissakes! Ji Won thought, frowning, as she quickly spun her head around and caught Shin’s eye. She wasn’t in the mood for his nonsense especially as right after dinner, she’d have to go back home and read several chapters about what women should do to keep a man. And the worst part was the writer was very much into routine so even though he acted like he was flexible, he only ever wanted to meet the day after turning his draft, at the same time at the same place.
She hit the reply button and typed:
We can meet tomorrow at 10am on the ground floor of the public library near my office.
Less than a minute later, a text came through.
Why don’t we meet tomorrow at 10am at the library near your office?
Ji Won rolled her eyes. Didn’t she just write that?
A minute after confirming her plans with the writer, another text from Shin came through.
O.K.
Okay to what? That he’d finally gotten the message and was no longer going to bother her? And twenty minutes later, when she and her friends were paying the bill, she was glad that her phone had been silent the whole time. Score? No more Shin?
***
We can meet tomorrow at 10am on the ground floor of the public library near my office.
Shin re-read that message a hundred times and couldn’t figure out why she’d sent it. All he’d really wanted was for her to text him back so that he could know that there were no heard feelings. But now she wanted to meet…?
Did she want to give him a stern warning and ask that he never contact her again? He wasn’t insane nor a stalker and he vowed that if she even as much as hinted that she’d wanted him to lose her number, he’d bow out gracefully. Not that it would be easy, but it would only be fair. And gentlemanly.
Staring at his reflection in the mirror, he wondered if he should make a quick stop at his favorite barber’s for a quick touch up then slapped his head in frustration.
“Get your act together! You’re a man, for goodness sake!” he yelled at his reflection.
Why he was fretting so much? She was only a woman. A wonderful, beautiful woman he had regrets about but still just a woman. So no big deal. He can just move on. Heck, he should have just moved on and never sent the first text. Why didn’t he just cut his losses? Why did he have to contact her? What did she want to say to him? Would she give him a chance to apologize? Would it make a difference? Was she going to threaten him with a restraining order? Glancing at the clock he kept in the cabinet, he wondered what was in store for him in exactly two hours.
About an hour later, as he was getting ready to leave his apartment, his phone rang.
“Gosh, she’s calling to cancel,” he said aloud, then slapped himself. “Be a damn man, you fool!” he said before clearing his throat to put on his baritone.
Pulling it out of his pocket, he glanced at the caller id then sighed.
“Harboji, good morning. Why are you calling so early? Is everything okay?”
“Yes, everything is fine. When next can you come over?”
“Huh? Harboji, didn’t I just come over to visit?” he glanced at his reflection one last time. He was looking as good as he ever could.
“Yes, but I want to talk to you.”
“About what?”
“I’ll tell you when you come by.”
He picked up his comb and ran it through his hair one last time then took another glance at his reflection. “Why can’t you tell me now? Am I not using the same ears to listen to you now?”
“Let’s talk in person.”
He sighed. Then froze for a second. Was something wrong? “Is Halmoni sick? Are you sick?”
“No. It’s nothing like that.”
He exhaled then picked up his lint brush for one last touch up. “Then what? I’m really busy, if you have something to say, just say it now.”
“We should do this in person, my son.”
Whatever. “Okay. I have to go now, Harboji.”
***
Ji Won found the usual table and plopped her laptop on it. She usually arrived about thirty minutes early to secure the table and mentally prepare for this particular client. Other than his sketchy qualifications as a relationship expert, Mr. Lee had a way of challenging every single thing she suggested. She was certain that if it wasn’t required that he work with an editor, he would have self edited – which would have been disastrous based on his drafts. He was funny but needed to be reminded that Spell Check wasn’t his enemy.
“I see you came in early as well,” he heard a voice say from behind her.
Recognizing it, she spun her head around in shock. What was he doing here?
“I must admit that I was surprised that you wanted to meet,” Shin said, walking over and standing in front of her.
She looked up at his smiling face, still confused. “Me?" she asked, point to herself. "I wanted to meet you?”
He nodded, registering the look on her face. “That’s what your text said." He reached for his phone, realizing that he’d need to show proof.
“I didn’t text you.”
He found it and showed it to her. “Then what is this?”
What was going on? She quickly pulled out her phone, searched her outbox and in a few seconds, found the incriminating evidence. She looked up at him in embarrassment.
Registering this look, he pulled out a chair and sat across from her. So clearly, there’d been a miscommunication but that didn’t mean he should turn around and leave. Why not make use of this opportunity? Especially with her looking so pretty. Did she dress up this much when they met?
Ji Won took a deep breath in and decided to go on the offensive. “You texted me so many times that I must have accidently hit the send button. I’m actually meeting with a client of mine in about…,” she paused to look at her watch, “… twenty minutes. I’m sorry about the misunderstanding. That text wasn’t meant for you.”
“I see.”
“I really am sorry, but…,” she said, looking at the door way, hoping that the hanging word would hint that he needed to leave. But since he didn’t budge and instead, kept staring at her with some weird look on his face, she had to be direct. “I need to prepare for my client so…”
“So, you’d like me to leave.”
She nodded. “That would make the most sense.” She looked away. He was clearly trying his best to disarm her with his smile but it wasn’t going to work.
“So you just want me to walk away after postponing another appointment to be here?”
She shrugged. What did he want from her? “I already apologized.”
“But how are you going to take responsibility for this?” he asked with a very serious look.
She frowned at him. “What?”
“I have an hour to kill and it’s all your fault,” he said. Sighing and making a big show of it.
“I don’t know what to say.”
“Say you’ll have dinner with me.”
Her mouth flung open then she chuckled. Was he for real? “This is not a movie so don’t even think about that.”
“Hey, it was worth a shot." He laughed. “Well,” he said, standing up, “I know how seriously you take your work so I shouldn’t take up any more of your time. But I might as well kill the time here. Maybe there’s a magazine I can read. Is that okay with you?”
“Suit yourself,” Ji Won said, grateful for the end of the conversation.
At 10 o’clock on the dot, her client walked in. She didn’t even need to turn around to know that Shin would be watching them from a few tables away but it didn’t matter. It was time to work, which meant her old client would be long forgotten.
***
That client of yours… He’s a bit of a jerk, isn’t he?
“You don’t say,” Ji Won whispered as she read the text. “Should I or should I not respond?” she asked herself. Well, what the heck. It was not like she had anything better to do as she waited for her order to arrive. Maybe if she replied once and for all, he’d back the hell off.
Well, he’s just like my last client.
Touché. Is his book interesting?
You can buy it in six months.
What’s it called?
Okay, wasn’t she being clear enough? Perhaps she needed to be more direct.
You’re bugging me.
It’s lunch time.
She laughed. How random.
So?
Let’s eat.
I’m already eating. Well, not technically. But she would be in a few minutes.
With him?
No.
You should have told me before you left for lunch so that we could have met up.
In his dreams.
I think you’re drunk.
lol. No I’m not. It’s not even 2pm yet. I’m just mad I missed that opportunity.
Which opportunity? You’re delusional.
You’re working with him the whole day?
How is it your business?
I can come and pick you up for dinner.
Ji Won laughed again. Was he for real?
I don’t want to eat with you.
My book is coming along well.
Good.
“Thank you,” she told the waitress before digging into her food.
But it’s not the same.
…
You’re responding to my texts.
You want me to stop?
Did your client stop being a jerk after I left?
What’s a jerk?
You just said someone like me.
No, he’s different – much nicer than you.
When did you become so mean?
It was from spending time with you.
“You” as in “you?”
Ji Won smiled. Oh, was he trying to be smart with her.
No. “You” as in “you”
lol. I knew you didn’t mean me but you.
Are you trying to be funny?
How can I try to be something I already am? So that new guy… he doesn’t know who’s boss – he keeps arguing with you. Do you want me to come over and tape his mouth shut?
She giggled.
Yes!
When should I came over?
After lunch.
Are you serious?
Of course. Bring really strong tape.
??
An impish smile covered Ji Won’s face.
Oh, you don’t get it? If you tape his mouth shut, you’ll get an assault charge. Which would land you in jail, and keep you from texting me.
She laughed at her little joke and waited for a reply but got nothing. About five minutes later, as she chewed the beef that for some reason no longer tasted as good, she wondered if she’d gone too far. But that was okay, right? The point was to get rid of him. But why did she feel bad? UGH! Why couldn’t she help the way she felt. She was supposed to feel good about this! But as she sat there waiting for his text, she reflected on everything that had happened and concluded that he wasn’t the devil, after all. So maybe he didn’t deserve to be treated that way. Maybe she should apologize.
I was only joking.
I really was only joking
With the way you joke, I didn’t think you’d be this sensitive.
It was only a little joke.
Shin smiled as he read the last series of texts. He hadn’t immediately replied to her last text because he’d received a call from his agent. But after reading those messages, he decided to let her squirm a little. He laughed to himself thinking that maybe, just maybe, it was a good thing to contact her after all.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)